I cheated 4 years ago...we sorta knew but never talked it out, I was never fully honest because I was too afraid. I acted cowardly about it. I am ashamed of what I did. He finally has the full story and has my all out confession, I even put it on paper for him with a signature cause we almost divorced few months ago and he felt like legally I was going to get everything. The courts side with mothers, just how it is. So he has that paper which is legally binding with my signature and my confession from my own words. I told family members because they seen him being angry and upset with me so this way they don't think he is an angry ogre type of man, they know he had a reason and was hurt. He keeps saying I need to atone for what I did...I don't know how! Ive been a housewife/stay at home mom for years..I know how to do domestic stuff, I know how to do college, but with this...im clueless. I thought being heartfelt, apologetic and validating his anger/pain was atonement, but Im wrong. I wore the scarlet letter so to say with the family that was witness to some of this.
What else can I do? I will do anything, I don't care how difficult or sacrificial. I just want to make this right, I'm scared I'm gonna lose my husband. One minute he is fine...the next he gets upset about something small and it blows up into "you fucked someone else! you didn't admit it for years! I'm offended you even say I love you! I dont care if your hurt, doesn't that seem wrong to you? You can cry for hours and I DON'T CARE!" One day it soundslike he does want a divorce and never wanted to take me back...the next he is calm and says "today was fun" gives me a kiss goodnight and the day was peaceful.
he said I had a second chance, but its been almost 2 months and I have not made this right yet and those feelings he had back then of givingme another chance are fading, he's not sure if I have a chance now. I don't know what else I can do other than being a good wife, showing him heart etc.
I need physical actions...actions..words mean nothing right now, cards mean nothing. I need something I can physically do, he is a man of action and proof. What can I do? and please don't say "he sounds like this or that, dont do anything just walk away etc" I won't walk out on him EVER, I won't leave him for anything. So your talking to a wall if your advice is around the lines of just let it go.
Asked by Anonymous at 10:34 AM on May. 22, 2011 in Relationships
Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:38 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by Fistandantalus at 10:40 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 10:43 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:45 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by miss_lisa at 10:47 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by JLS2388 at 10:49 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by ImaginationMama at 10:58 AM on May. 22, 2011