Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Dealing with when pregnancy will neither happen nor stick

I'm having to come to terms with that the family size,spacing any part of it may not happen. I am almost 21 years old,I have one son and have lost at least seven children. Even in the pregnancy with my son I lost his twin. I also go months without ovulating for no reason. My insurance will cover any birth control you want but will not cover any testing to find out why I have these issues and my age causes more issues because everyone's solution is you have a lot of time just keep trying. I do not have a lot of time the majority of women in my family cannot have children after age 30,my own Mother's ovaries just failed at 29. I have 8-10 years before I probly can't have anymore and all everyone seems to tell me is that you have all the time in the world.

Sorry about the vent but I really needed to get that out I'm in the process of slowly losing number eight. How do you deal with your entire idea of a family you wanted since age 5 not being possible? And short of blowing up at them how do you deal with people who keep telling you that you just need to relax and it will work when it's meant to?

Answer Question

Asked by lizziebreath at 2:59 PM on May. 22, 2011 in Trying to Conceive

Level 19 (6,846 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • This is a battle I've struggled with for 10 years... Not exactly the same, but similar in the fact that I can no longer have children, and I certainly wanted more than one. About 30 minutes after my dd was born, they had to do an emergency hysterectomy. I was 18. I was devastated! All I can tell you is to keep trying, but start considering adoption.
    "Not flesh of my flesh, Nor bone of my bone,
    But still miraculously my own.
    Never forget for a single minute,
    You didn't grow under my heart - but in it"
    --- Fleur Conkling Heylinger

    Answer by CeeCee333 at 3:12 PM on May. 22, 2011

  • My mil was in the same boat. She always wanted a large family and tried and tried and probably had around 10 miscarriages before and after she had my dh. She eventually had to have a hysterectomy and gave up her dream of a large family and put all of her focus and attention on my dh. He was one spoiled kid, sometimes he still is. Well her dream of having a large family did come true but it came in the form of grandchildren and now great grandchildren. I think you should take a break between pregnancies as well. It is no good for your body. Wait a few months before trying again so you are completely healed. And remember God does have a plan, and you never know in the future your little boy might bring you several grandchildren.

    Answer by gemgem at 3:32 PM on May. 22, 2011

  • Hmmm, so sorry. Maybe coming to terms is just what you need. Sounds like a genetic thing in your family. You can either keep trying or end it. It's up to you if you want to keep chancing the heart break. As for other people, they have no clue so just ignore it. Stop announcing you are trying or that you are pregnant and just go on with your life. Good Luck

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 3:51 PM on May. 22, 2011

  • We don't announce it anymore. We live with them and sometimes I get really depressed so I get interrogated until I give a good reason why I'm not coming for dinner or why we need them to watch DS or why I'm having another crying episode.

    Comment by lizziebreath (original poster) at 4:14 PM on May. 22, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.