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Working and Family...

We are about to have our 3rd child in November... I work full time and my husband is in the military, so he has long hours too. Ive been getting overwhelmed dealing with two children and a husband and working. When Im at work, I am stressed about housework and the kids... and when Im at home, I stressed about work. I am scared to take a break from work because I never want to depend on someone cause you neveer know what could happen and I could lose the chance to move forward with my career. How do I seperate the two and have time to get everything done around the house? Any advice out there from working mothers?

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thatgrlkels

Asked by thatgrlkels at 10:16 AM on May. 23, 2011 in Money & Work

Level 7 (184 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • That's a tough one.

    I've left in the mornings thinking "Holy crap my house is a mess." When I get home from work at night, cleaning is the last thing on my mind. I always think that it can wait and that my daughter is more important.

    My only advice is to let something go. Obviously make sure your house isn't a pigsty, but maybe just relax your clean standards until you get into a routine.
    CraftingMama

    Answer by CraftingMama at 10:20 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • Hi, I have one son, so I can imagine how much harder it is for you. I KWYM, I used to work outside of the home. What I did was figure out that I was spending too much time doing certain things. For me it was cooking and laundry. I cleaned out my closets so that I could hang up as many clothes as I could instead of folding things, this made a huge difference! Also, folding underwear went out the window! As for cooking, we buy what is on sale, make a menu for the week for that, and cook double. Then there will be weeks you can pull stuff out that you have frozen and it will save you time. I also tried to be organized with one calendar for everyone, so I knew what was going on, husband took over the grocery shopping because he could do it on his way home from work w/o kids. Try this site, flylady.net she saved my life. It's like a clean as you go kind of philososphy! Good luck! Just try to cut corners where you can.
    dwmom2008

    Answer by dwmom2008 at 10:22 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • Flylady has some good ideas on her site. I haven't been in a while, but I remember that the site is very cluttered and hard to manage. But it's good info if you can find it.
    CraftingMama

    Answer by CraftingMama at 10:24 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • the only advice I can give is to not worry about any of it. Worry doesn't do anything but keep your mind from dealing with the present problems and decision making, and it wastes time. Also, keep in mind that everything you worried about with your job won't make a bit of difference in the next year or two. Especially after you quit that job and move on.
    Do your best, Do what works for your family, and have fun with both and enjoy it all. Even the stressfull times. If your kids have hands, make them start cleaning on a daily basis, just one thing like a bathroom or hallway. By Friday it will be done. There will be no major award when you turn 70 for being SuperMom, only the memories that you and your family has. Nobody lies on their death bed and says " I should have kept my house cleaner" or " I should have worked harder".
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 10:26 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • I would love to share with you myjourney that helped me find a balance with all the above. ha! let me know if you are interested in hearing more! hope this helps!
    thanks!
    arbnmom

    Answer by arbnmom at 10:44 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • I totally understand not wanting to take a break from work. I'm in a career field that is very difficult to get back into if you leave PLUS you take a hit on your retirement. Like the previous posters suggest, make peace with some of the disorder. Also, while it is impossible to leave your mommy life when you're at work, do try to leave work at work when you are at home. Does your job offer an employee assistance program? Sometimes they can give suggestions for work-life balance. I'm with you, mama. Best of luck with everything!
    jmpj8107

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 11:08 AM on May. 23, 2011

  • Just do one room at a time - it is nearly impossible to keep a house clean with children.
    tasches

    Answer by tasches at 6:47 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • Get a cleaning woman in once a week
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:48 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • my sugestion hire a cleaning person or service to do the heavy stuff (bathrooms, vacuming, moping, dusting) they only have to come one a week for like an hour.....and the rest is mangable.....and get on a system....ie as soon as dinner is done load the dishwasher....pick up kids toys right before bed (they can help) start load of laundary while you wait for the coffee in the morning.....this are tips that work for me......
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 10:17 AM on May. 24, 2011

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