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Why are you so opposed to spanking?

sometimes people get on here and ask what do i do. the kids are hitting ,kicking ,scratching ,and bullying others.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:58 AM on May. 23, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • IMO I think it is fine to spank your child for serious misbehaviors. My mother only spanked me 2x ever and boy did I deserve it. As long as you're not beating the kid, what's the big deal? And I don't mean this offensively, but I don't feel the need to be anonymous either.
    Kari727

    Answer by Kari727 at 12:04 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I'm opposed to spanking because there are other methods of discipline that work as well as or better.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 12:05 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • If your kids are hitting, kicking, scratching and bullying others and you are spanking them for it, you are saying it is okay for you to hit, but it is not okay for them. That message is confusing to kids. I was spanked as a kid because that is what my grandparents did to my parents when they were kids. I'm not going to spank my kids because I know a better way. Teach your kids to behave starting as babies, and their behaviors will be easier to work with later on. I tapped my son on the hand one time when he was reaching for the cords on the TV, and for weeks after he was slapping my hand. It took me over a month to get him to stop after hitting him one single time. In my opinion, hitting your kids just teaches them that hitting is acceptable.
    alphamom26

    Answer by alphamom26 at 12:14 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • A lot of studies have shown that it does not work and only makes the problem worse by giving a punishment that does not get to the root of the problem.

    I personally am okay with it for severe offenses that could hurt themselves or others. I think spanking should be reserved for SERIOUS offenses, not reoccuring behavior.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I am against it because it is not necessary to hit your child to get them to behave. I was never spanked as a child, why should I spank my child? To me its abuse. You are telling the child if you dont get your way you can assault someone and make them feel inferior by hitting them. There is no need to try and break a childs spirit that way. I think 100 years ago people also thought it was ok to hit wives so they would be compliant and do what their husbands wanted. Now we know that was wrong. Kids are human beings, not punching bags.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 12:04 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • So you are spanking your kids for hitting someone? Wow that is in no way sending mixed messages now is it?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:14 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I believe in spanking (like the previous poster for serious offenses).
    smurfyangel

    Answer by smurfyangel at 12:03 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I completely disagree with the first Anon. I think spanking should NEVER be reserved for SERIOUS offenses. I will gently spank my kid if he/she does something wrong like spilling juice on the couch but if they do something SERIOUS I will want to analyse WHY they did it and how I am going to prevent whatever it is they did from happening again.

    mysevenkids

    Answer by mysevenkids at 12:06 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I was spanked as a kid, for serious things, and I firmly believe that is the way to go. Maybe not to the extent I was spanked at but still I will be using it as a puunishment as well as a niiicee long lecture as to why they shouldnt have done whatever they did... a nice long hug and i still love you at the end always worked for me. I laugh in my head at people who try the "okay Honey now we dont do that" and watch the kid trot off and do exactly whatever they were doing. Most people I know who got that grew up to be in a bad place in life. Im not saying it doesnt work for some, just none that I know.
    kgrine

    Answer by kgrine at 12:22 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I have pretty extensive education in child development, attachment theory, and child counseling. It is well accepted between those educated in the field that spanking is an undesireable form of discipline. It teaches fear. It also teaches that physical means of getting your point across are acceptable. What it doesn't teach? The lesson that the spanker is actually trying to teach actually does not get learned.

    A therapist or teacher who suggests that a parent "spank" would be at risk for losing license and position.

    It is actually not okay.

    It is widespreadly used, and therefore we do not prosecute, but it is not okay to do.
    ImaginationMama

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 12:22 PM on May. 23, 2011

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