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What kind of backlash to expect?

In previous posts i have mentioned how dh has custody of his two sons and that bio mom gets supervised visits one day a week and every other weekend. I have also mentioned that this has been the first year she has wanted to go to parent teacher confrences and for my one stepson his iep meetings. The other confrences she has insisted on scheduling her own in order to avoid dh. (fine by us lol) This time they must have not let that happen because they both had the meeting today. The difference is dh could not get out of work so he scheduled his to be a phone conference but bio mom actually showed up. Anyway dh has me paranoid that this crazy b is going to lash out due to the fact that during the meeting she must have ended up feeling "dumb." The reason he says this is because the entire time his teachers went on and on about how great he is doing and how he loves studying at HOME with his mom. (Not meaning her) Now part of me says well she can't be mad because she has told the boys before, not to bring homework over there because it cuts into HER time. I am fine with that escpecially sice my older stepson is dyslexic along with some other learning disabilities. We have a system to how we study etc. But the other part of me says "wow she must be REALLY insulted" Dh thinks she is all of a sudden going to want to do work with them , which he is TOTALLY against because he feels she will screw up how good they are doing. I sort of agree but then i think what harm can her looking over what they're doing only once a week really hurt. He is just more worried about her just giving answers and allowing them to get away with sloppy work that they would end up coming home and having to fix anyway. But due to her past and how she is known for her mental abuse of the kids i worry she will take out her anger on my stepsons and somehow make them feel bad for doing well "without her" These kids have enough self esteem issues due to her they don't need any extra. I really hope i am worrying for nothing, and that what was said to her at this meeting was nothing new from the others its just that this time my dh got to hear it. So do you all think we're up for some more drama? Do you think this will blow over like the other meetings? If there is more drama i'm just not sure how to handle it. I will try to let dh handle it but it just gets sooo ugly when they attempt to talk that i end up doing it.


Asked by Genice6 at 11:59 AM on May. 23, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 14 (1,450 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • She may try to be more involved with homework and such for a short time but soon enough she will fall back into her old habits and ways. I'd make copies of all their homework. Have them do them all at home and then send the undone copy with them to see bio. Even if she tries to work with them and do their homework it won't matter because they will have already done it right at home. sometimes bios are a (*&^( )( $%#!. Sorry.


    Answer by meooma at 12:03 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • If she has supervised visits I wouldn't worry about the verbal abuse. Just send the weeks spelling words or something easy over. GL

    Answer by aheuszel at 12:03 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I think she is going to tell her sons not to call you mom and ask the teachers why they insist on calling you their mom. My son lives with his dad and his now ex used to tell people she was my sons mom. I corrected that mistake myself with the schools though.

    Answer by gemgem at 12:02 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • I believe she has every right to look over her children's work (as you said) - And since you usually help the children anyway, you can assist if she does "screw anything up." Perhaps she has turned over a new leaf since you said she is showing up to meetings now?

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 12:05 PM on May. 23, 2011

  • oh and just for the record i do not tell/ask them to call me mom. Its funny because at home they usually call me "g" and the school knows that i am the stepmom but that they live with me and dh. However on certain occasions the teachers say they're not sure "which" mom the boys mean, because at school they call us both mom. I guess it gets confusing for the teachers but there are MANY reasons i do NOT want to be mistaken as her lol

    Comment by Genice6 (original poster) at 12:12 PM on May. 23, 2011