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This is so not fair!! Why can't I find it?

I was just dumped by my SO. He's already got a date with his hs crush. I hate him, I want him back. My children are so confused. They don't know why he's doing this. My 12 yr old was trying to cut herself yesterday and talked about suicide.

I wish my kids didn't have to go through this. I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up. I can't though, I have my babies. I want to cut, but I am a mom and can't. I hurt - but gotta try to take care of them.

I just want to make them safe and happy. I am dying trying.


Asked by Babylove76 at 9:15 AM on Dec. 8, 2008 in Health

Level 21 (10,227 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (24)
  • egg his car!!!!! =D just kidding. just stay strong tell yourself everyday when you wake up that today will get a little better then the day before. if you haven't already, don't tell your children WHY although YOU hate him right now... you don't want your children to know details and the bad things. your SO is obviously going through something emotional. try and get him to go see a counselor if you want him back. But for now surround yourself with LOVE. LOVE of your children, your family and your friends. They will help get you through this.. and you can't just "say screw him" you obviously love him and care for him and he IS your childrens father. so breath in and breath out and you'll get through it!!!

    Answer by krazyash023 at 10:20 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • i know you are hurt right now and that is understandable. but you need to get a grip. things are never as bad as they seem you need to forget about your SO and concentrate on you and your children especially your twelve year old. it sounds like your family needs someone to talk to to get your feelings out and get them straight. cutting or suicide is not the answer especailly becuz of a man. please talk to someone and get your child in to see some one so you can get her help. if you need some one to talk to please pm me.

    Answer by jodi205 at 9:19 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • YOU are doing a good job. you can't blame yourself for what he does.YOU are their mom,YOU gave them life and YOU are the most important thing in their lives. You know how to be there for them be there for each other do more stuff together if you can. your love for them and their love for you will probably makethings better.

    Answer by Ktsou at 9:19 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I cannot stop crying

    Answer by Babylove76 at 9:24 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • The sweetest revenge is your own success.... a happy coincidence is that it's also the one thing over which YOU have control. Take life by the horns and make your own happiness. Get some therapy for you and the kids. They need a good mom & they need help processing this right now (like you). BIG fat virtual hugs!

    Answer by AggieMamacita at 9:41 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • "Mother is the name of God to a child".
    (like to take credit but I got it from "The Crow".
    A man can be replaced - a child cannnot.
    I know it hurts (god have I been there!) but it will get better - focus on your kids. Do more stuff w/ them. Christmas is coming up - make cookies or homemade decorations. When my ex left I tore all the carpet out of the house and redid the hardwood floors, took the kids sled riding, learned how to snowboard, and went dancing w/ friends from work. Realized after about the 5th guy hit on me (and I am fat and old, for god's sake - one guy was only 22 and I"m pushing 40!) that, hey, maybe this isn't so bad!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • Screw him moma!Live your life to the fullest and take care of your kiddies!

    Answer by Haylie08 at 10:00 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • There is NO man worth even tying such about. You are accountable for your kids, not what man is there. He is not worth the turmoil. Move on. Easier said than done but it can be done. I hope you find it within yourself to let him go and move on.

    Answer by JLynn0871 at 10:00 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • You just said "I hate him" followed immediately by "I want him back". He should not have the choice to just leave you, have you feeling this horrible, doing this to your children, going out on a date and probably fling with some girl, and then just walking back to you. NO WAY! That man just proved that he is not capable of good judgment and if you had him back, he would think this behavior is acceptable. You don't want to live the rest of your life wondering when he's going to do this again. There are good men out there that wont do this to you. Don't think for a second that everybody goes through rough patches like this. And please don't think "well, we've been together so long, I would hate to throw it away"...staying will only put more time into a relationship where you're not respected. Being alone isn't so bad...I promise.

    Answer by kabbot01 at 10:04 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • Thanks ladies. It's just so hard to think that it's not me. He tells me he would have it so much better if it weren't for me and the kids. UMMM, he's been eating all our food! No! He doesn't get FS - WE DO! He has been giving his money to his mom and then bitches that I took all his money?! I haven't touched a goddamn dime of his!!

    Answer by Babylove76 at 10:09 AM on Dec. 8, 2008