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How do you make someone understand that their child has behavioral problems?

My ex's 6 year old son (my ds's half brother) is a monster IMO but they think he's angel. It's not his fault. They put him in front of the tv and ignore him and then just scream at him when he does something to get attention. I've tried to talk to him about it, but he just gets defensive and says it's normal kid stuff.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:15 AM on Dec. 8, 2008 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Man that does suck, some adults now a days just want to shoosh the child away instead of spending some time with them all they will ever know is that the adult just pushes them away and they will find out about life the best way the know. God bless those children that are not as fortunate. We all work we are all tired but come on take a break then ask the child what was it they were needing. Just 15 to 30 minutea of ur time is not going to kill them.

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 10:23 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I don't think it is your place to say anything about the boys behavior.

    Unless they bring the boy to your house and you have to put up with the boy.

    Then I would say you have a right to tell them to control the boy's behavior.


    Answer by louise2 at 10:29 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • Unfortunately it isn't your place to say that the kid's behavior is less than steller. But if this child does live with you then there are some options you have. 1) you can role model good parenting by being active with him. Play outside, play board games, play made up silly games, hold family night, have him help you to cook dinner, take him to run errands, ect.... 2) Talk to him and include him in conversations - you know, treat him like a person and not some statue in front of the television. 3) Have a routine set up at your home that is unplugged (as in no electronics, no video games, no t.v., not computer...). You have the power to unplug your television. Do it. Just do it. Your a grown woman. Be a role model for your child and your stepson.

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:45 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • cont...4) You can also do so much in terms of just letting him know you like him and want him to talk to you. Ask him about his day, his thoughts, his opinions, and feelings on a variety of subjects. Know what he is interested in and likes. 5) Talk to your husband about what kind of parent you see yourself as. Your dreams for your children and how you want to get there. Tell him you want a family night unplugged, sit down dinners, conversations, and show him how to get there by just doing it. When others see how you can parent by being active, and that it improves a child's relationship with the adults around them (not to mention behavior improves) others will follow your lead. But I would be careful not to tell his mother that her parenting skills need help. Do what you can and let others see how amazing you can be as a parent.

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:49 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • He doesn't live with me, but he is going to be around my son and I don't want him picking up his behavior or being treated the way they treat him. Since he could be a bad influence on my son I do feel that it's my place to say something.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • they need to hear the same stuff from lots of people before they will listen to it... jmo... i teach so we have to gang up sometimes, even call the new school the kid goes to warn them, it is all the better the child so i dont think it to be mean, they need to hear it from lots of other people. video taping if allowed is very powerful too. i feel bad for the ignored tv kids!

    Answer by AmaliaD at 11:55 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • It really isn't your place. You know what will really shock you - is they probably don't like the way you're raising your son either. I know in my own experience with friends and their kids -- they think my angels are brats, and I think their angels are brats. You don't live their life 24/7. You're not in any place to give them parenting advice, sorry. What I would do when he is at your house - enforce YOUR house rules... but realistically, nothing good will come from trying to tell his parents you think they're doing a bad job. They won't change their ways, and you'll just become the bad guy.

    Answer by Serafyna at 12:03 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I hate when people say it is not a step parents place to help raise the stepchild! If they are in your house and they are around your kids then your rules apply. I have been a stepmom for almost 6 years and it is NOT cake. It can be, but when there are different standards, it can make it hard. PM me if you need a shoulder, because you will matter in his life, don't let anyone tell you differently!

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 12:09 PM on Dec. 8, 2008