Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

My man is not coming home at night!

well he is...but at around 1 or 2 in the morning.
we have already talked about it soooo many times.
he is unwilling to change!!
he absolutely refuses to come home, he does not care about my feelings about it
what do i do, live with it?? how can i not??
im a stuck with this forever??
i have a counselor even, i told her, she said he should not be living at my house if its affecting my life like this. but....we are a couple, he thinks im asking too much, when all im asking for is the norm. he invites me but i dont find it that fun. this time, he brought his ps3 over there so they will be playing black ops all night. i have no netflix now, no music or controller to play games. i have nothing. he just takes all the fun and leaves. im so sick of this!!! not to mention he comes home either drunk or high or both.
what can be done!!!! he refuses to listen!!!!


Asked by Liz4Life at 12:32 AM on May. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (4,309 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (28)
  • ok, so it sounds like you already made up your mind but...
    #1 - if he is living in your house then you are the one in charge. when he doesn't come home it is very disrespectful of him and shows that he really doesn't value you and the relationship.
    #2 - telling you it would be illegal to throw him out is a poor excuse and sound like the first steps to trying to control you. been there, done that & let me assure you that a controlling husband SUCKS!!! And just because you throw him out to find his own place to live doesn't mean that you have to break up. I tossed my current husband out of MY house 3 weeks before we got married. Obviously it straightened him out & we are still together 6 years later.
    #3 - no need to stoop to his level by staying out when you dont want to, he may not even notice (or, if he IS controlling it will only make things worse for you).
    Stand up for yourself and demand some respect!

    Answer by shareleann at 2:16 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Change the locks--kick his ass out--go out and party yourself and don't come home--pick one...........or pick all.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 12:38 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Leave!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • No, it won't be illegal to kick him out. He can find another place and have the mail forwarded to his address. You can ask the Post Office to hold his mail until he does get a forwarding address.

    I agree with the other ladies. Pack his stuff, put it outside the house, change the locks. And if he tries to break in, call the cops.

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 12:45 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Theres a possibility he could be cheating on you, you know this. If he isn't willing to get his shit together for the sake of your relationship, obviously, he doesn't care about you, or the relationship. Its not illegal to kick him out, he sounds like a dead beat, especially if hes coming home drunk or high. If my husband did that to me, even just once, I'd make his ass sleep somewhere else, because he will no longer be in my bed if hes going to act like that. I'm a stay at home wife/mother too, he pays the bills and everything. I won't be treated like that though, no way.

    Answer by monstersmommy20 at 12:57 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Doesn't sound like he will change unless you do something drastic, unfortunately. (And kicking him out doesn't mean you have to break up with him.)

    Hope he gets his head screwed on straight. The sooner the better :/

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 12:53 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • If there are problems while you're engaged, they'll only continue when you're married. Get this settled NOW before he'll own half of everything you have!

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 12:53 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Lock the door at midnight.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Who's place is it? If it is yours then it is NOT in any way illegal to kick him out, if he wants his mail he goes to the post office and fills out a form to have it forwarded elsewhere. He is full of it. If it is his place, or anyone else's, and you are tired of putting up with this then you should find another place to go. You don't have to put up with this off of him.

    Answer by lisalmeyer86 at 12:47 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Change the locks, put his stuff in bags on the sidewalk and consider it over. If he bothers you more then file a restraining order.

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 12:41 AM on May. 24, 2011