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2 Bumps

My DH says our DS (9mo) is too attached to me...

And its 100% true, he's always been a bit "clingy" as my DH calls it. I try not to hold him "too much" but what's too much to for DH isn't really too much in my mind I guess. He loves to crawl and play with his toys on the floor but if I'm around he just lays on his back with his arms outstretched crying and staring at me. I try to wait before I "give in" but I can't stand to just watch him cry... Then my DH says stuff to me like "that doesn't happen when ur at work." It makes me feel kind of bad but I don't know how to encourage him to learn how to get by without screaming "MOM" as I walk out of the room for a sec. He also has started to do that when I drop him off at my MILs to go to work.

Can I get some suggestions or a bump for more opinions please? I'm really at a loss on this one.

Answer Question
 
kpincince

Asked by kpincince at 1:42 AM on May. 24, 2011 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 5 (89 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • 9 months is the age where they start being afraid to go to strangers. Wha t is hapening is normal. You spend all day with him. Dad may need a little attention so he doesn't feel so out of the loop.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:48 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • I think it is normal for babies that young to be very attached to their mothers. Sounds to me like your husband needs some educating about children and parenting. People used to tease me when my youngest son was a baby that every time they saw me I was carrying him around. There is nothing wrong with babies being very attached to their mothers, or fathers in my opinion.
    Southernroots

    Answer by Southernroots at 1:48 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • that is the age when most babies start to have separation anxiety & stanger fears. It's hard not to carry them and hold them all the time. You can try to distract him with something when he is with you and crying to be held. You hubby just doesn't understand. It will get better.
    shareleann

    Answer by shareleann at 3:30 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Hubby needs to get over himself... baby is NORMAL. If he wants his son to be emotionally damaged, then he can push his point of view...
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:06 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • hahahahaaha! I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh, but Mom is his world right now.... enjoy it as quickly they go to the "I DO MYSELF!" phase. Your child is not coddled... he is a baby and Mama is queen
    hollydaze1974

    Answer by hollydaze1974 at 12:04 PM on May. 24, 2011

  • Thanks everyone. I def can't stand letting him cry but DH is always telling me to ignore him, he's fine, and if i wasnt around he'd stop quicker. I dont want to be "spoiling" him as DH calls it but I can't not respond to his cries. I feel like if all he wants is me to sit next to him, then its so much better for me to just do that than make him think momma doesn't care about him. I want him to develope into an emotionally strong and capable man one day and I think the more I acknowledge his emotional needs appropriately now, then that will help him in the future. Honestly I never thought about DH having trouble with my putting DSs needs first always. That may actually be why he says these things.
    kpincince

    Comment by kpincince (original poster) at 1:05 PM on May. 24, 2011

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