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How do you reconnect after deployment?

My husband left for Korea a week before we found out that I was pregnant. Now he's back and our daughter is four months but we haven't been connecting the same as we did before he left. I know that a lot has changed in the last year but I need to feel connected to him again. I tried talking to him but he doesn't really know what I mean. I don't know how to handle this. Any ideas?

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leynasmom

Asked by leynasmom at 2:35 PM on Jul. 11, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • Don't push it... try to do some fun things together & act "normal" around him. Also, you're going to want to "Teach" him how to take care of your DD, but do NOT nag him. He will come around soon. My DH missed the entire first year of our son's life in Iraq, and was a little "shy" at first, but he has come around & is a great husband and father. I know you're in a hurry to get your life back, but you need to give him a little time, and maybe a little space.
    crazysocks830

    Answer by crazysocks830 at 3:13 PM on Jul. 11, 2008

  • make a date night.trade with another couple in his unit if your worried about cost. make sure that you let him know that you remember you are stil a couple not just parents.With the kido: leave him with the baby...i know its scary, just do it. he has to develop his own way of doing things with the baby.like she said above (as long as little one isnt in danger) dont nag him or try to get him to do it your way let him work that out. best of luck hun.
    electricblue

    Answer by electricblue at 4:47 PM on Jul. 11, 2008

  • It's hard for him to readjust for one, while you're just trying to get used to him being home, he's trying to readjust to EVERYTHING from driving the car, to being around his own country, to being a husband again to the responsibilities. Don't push him be patient, it's harder for him then you think
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 6:19 PM on Jul. 11, 2008

  • So this is his first time really being with the baby? And here you are a pro. It must be quite difficult for him. Is he confident in playing with baby? Try not to tell him how to do things. My husband does things (the way he reads to, plays with, relates to) differently with our kids. It's what makes him a man and me a woman.

    Hope this helps...
    TXdanielly

    Answer by TXdanielly at 10:13 PM on Jul. 11, 2008

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