Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

6 Bumps

My 13yo son spent the night with his friend and his 16 yo sister which was babysitting them had sex with my son.

i have not been able to sleep or eat and am just really unsure of wht to do. the girl just had a baby a few months ago and is very sexually active. i want to press charges but the family are good friends of our family. besides the usual getting std tests ran how do i deal with this. yes took his virginity and is telling everyone at her school and we live in a small community so it has gotten around the school her brother and my son go to so now hes being harrassed at school and on the ball team both boys play for and to make it worse i have twin boys so now his brother is catching grief as well. ok look i did not know they were gonna be left alone. the mother decided to go out wihth friends and left them there. it happened over the weekend and i didnt find out til my son came home from school and told me. i have talked to the mother of the girl and she had the girl tell me her part and her and my son both said he was sleeping and he woke up to her on top of him. she admits everything and the state law where i live is under 16 is statutory. but will do any good to put her family through this?


Asked by sdwkck4 at 10:52 AM on May. 24, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 3 (24 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (27)
  • Look up the laws on statutory rape and go from there. Friends or not it is something you need to decide what to do with.

    Answer by gemgem at 10:55 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Oh wow. This happened to my dh, same scenario, 17yo babysitter got him at 13... of course, being so young, he wouldn't have known how to initiate the act, and her being older, she has every call to know better. It's not like your son FORCED her. I would press charges, get that predator off the streets!!!

    Her family can care for her baby just fine. Babies need a mom, not a monster. That girl needs help, before she strikes out again.

    A 17yo boy in high school was caught having sexual relations with a 23yo coach, coach was sentenced to a year in jail, and lost her job and sponsors. That boy turned around and was caught with a 13yo in the act. Went to jail, bailed out, and was caught doing it again! He was yanked from school, his full ride scholarship for football was revoked, and he gets jailtime until the courts decide what to do with him.

    Please say something, help stop the cycle!

    Answer by matobe at 11:03 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • She's still a kid herself and there is only 3 yrs. diiff. i know at 13 i knew all about sex and my sister at 13 knows even more then I did at that age...just because parents want to be blind about these things it's happening need to go to her parents and ALL of you need to sit down and have a talk and figure out just what happened.

    Answer by happymama02 at 11:08 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • He needs to go to the ER and have a sexual assault exam done before you can proceed in pressing charges.

    Answer by CraftingMama at 10:56 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • OMG, I'm so so sorry. That girl needs some serious help, do her parents realize this. This is my thought on pressing charges....If, heaven forbid, your son contracted an STD or if she got pregnant again, pressing charges will not change either of those things. I only say that b/c is sounds like you might not want to since your families' are close. On the other hand, pressing charges might get her put away for a short time, if your son said NO, but if he didn't, what charges can be pressed?

    Answer by yesmaam at 10:56 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • you may not want to think about this, but if they did not use birth control, are you prepared for the fact that she could have gotten pregnant again and you may be responsible for supporting a child? and i would not take your son's word about whether or not birth conrol was used, i would find out from her parents if she is on something first! you need to research your rights/responsibilities ASAP! contact a lawyer.

    i am so sorry that this happened. it's just awful, as a parent of a son, it's a nightmare and again, sorry!

    Answer by dwmom2008 at 11:00 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • There are laws for this. I'd first check to see exactly what they are in your state. There is probably little you can do to stop the harassment at school. I'm sure both your sons are having a hard time with this. Good luck to all of you.


    Answer by meooma at 11:01 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • That's a tough situation... Have you spoken to your son is he upset? Does he feel that he was taken advantage of? Regardless of them being your friends think of it this way if the roles were somewhat reversed and your 13 year old had been a girl and the 16 year old had been a boy would you have pressed charges then? If you say yes then I would go talk to someone.

    Answer by abrown2590 at 11:13 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • If it were the other way around, if it was a 13 year old girl waking up to a 16 year old boy having sex with her, there would be rape charges. Just saying....

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:20 AM on May. 24, 2011

  • Noticing vote downs on logical answers. Logic beyong you vote down fairy?

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 AM on May. 24, 2011