This is about anything and the small things never used to bother me, we've been together 14 years now but it seems to have gotten worse since our son was born 3-1/2 years ago.. To at first not making enough for his family in his current position but he had a full day with his son so that helped but still tossed at him daily, now he has a different position at work during the days but its longer hours but more money, but now all he does is complain he is spending too much time away from us.. ( which is about an extra hour a day, sometimes 2 ) which does mean he sometimes only see's our son 1-1/2 hours a night so I am trying to understand and be supportive.. we just sold our house and he wants the "Perfect " house. Which isn't possible - we can either move further away, which means driving more and possibly seeing us even less but a perfect house - or move in an area with an older house which isn't "perfect" looking but it woudl be driving as much as we are already - well he keeps going back and forth wanting it ALL.. Ok, but we already SOLD our house.. we close at the end of july.. its driving me NUTS right now.. grr.. I am pretty passive so its hard for me to just say, Listen jack, Make a damn decision already, when in reality I know he'll complain about either one he makes anyway :( anyone else have to deal with this personality
Answer by NikkiVan1 at 12:52 PM on May. 24, 2011
It sounds like your husband lacks confidence in himself. You can help that by complimenting and encouraging him whenever he does anything of which you can take note. Just remember to be sincere. If you try to manufacture compliments, he will spot your phoniness and you will do more harm than good. Just concentrate on building up his self-esteem and you will likely see progress in the other areas. If he had a controlling mother, he grew used to having her make his decisions. If he had a passive mother, he grew up never knowing whether he was doing the right thing or not. So, you get to be the deciding vote, and I think that's pretty exciting.
Answer by NannyB. at 12:48 PM on May. 24, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 12:45 PM on May. 24, 2011
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