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Why do they NOT get the concept of a "compromised immune system"?!!

First of all, my husband does not get ANY sick time. He only gets 2 weeks of vacation time, most of which he saves for "sick time" so he can have a day off when he is ill. So when I am sick, he can't take the day off unless I am pretty much dying.

I am nearing the end of a very difficult and delicate pregnancy. I am 7 mos. along, and have had a very hard time. We have a 1 year old who is teething ( and you know what that means....)

We have told everyone in our families that we can't be around sick people for these reasons.

A month ago, my sister invited us over without telling us that her kids were very sick with a horrible cold. We saw they were sick and were only there long enough for me to use the bathroom, and we left. I caught the dang bug anyway, even though I washed my hands like a fiend. The cold settled in my chest and I ended up with a very bad cough. After one coughing fit, I realized I was bleeding. I called my hubby at work and he came home and took me to the hospital. The doctor said that my cough was bad enough in my type of pregnancy to break my membranes and cause early labor. They took care of me and sent us home. A week later, my 1 year old was very sick and up all night for a few days. A hard pregnancy is bad enough without your baby not being able to breathe or sleep....And no one to help, since my husband has to work. For the whole week, both my baby and I were very sick, and just finally got over it this week.

My sister-in-law posted on my facebook that she was looking forward to going to our baby's birthday party this weekend (postponed due to our illness), even though she posted two minutes before that her kids were throwing up today.

Why don't they get it?!! We've said it a hundred times and everyone knows about our scary day in the hospital where we thought we were going to end up having a baby two months early!!! What do you say/do?!?


Asked by Anonymous at 12:08 PM on May. 25, 2011 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Just tell your SIL that she is NOT to come over unless her children have been symptom free for at least 24 hours. Usually stomach bugs only last that long. I'm really sorry that this is a rough pregnancy for you!

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 12:12 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • You must tell them if you are not well do not come over. If they cannot accept that too bad for them.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:16 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • First of all, congratulations on your pregnancy and little one. It may be a little hard initially to have two in diapers but will be well worth it when they can play together.

    I have lived some of your experience. I have a sister with a child who is disabled and I see how she struggles with this same issue and how clueless people can be. Guests will figure that you would be more offended if they dont show up than if they show up coughing and hacking. In the beginning, she was nice about it and you know what... her child ended up in the ICU. Now she just out and out tells the person that she would love to see them but that the kids have to be healthy and/or an age where they know how to limit exposure to germs (old enough to know to cough into a sleeve, blow noses, wash hands. Otherwise she'll see them another time.

    She also have antibaterial lotion conveniently located all over her house. Good Luck!

    Answer by 2ndtimewish at 12:23 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Don't tell them when the baby is born. She will probably get mad, but she can get over it. It's better to have a mad adult than a sick infant.

    Answer by scout_mom at 12:11 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Forgot to mention, we have a tiny apartment ( well, big bedrooms, tiny living room/kitchen) and we are having the party at my parents house instead of here. We don't feel like we can restrict others from coming if it isn't our house, even though we are hosting the party.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:15 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • You say it again more firmly and you stay at home and do not invite anyone over or go anywhere. You should wear one of those dr. masks if you do go anywhere... Since you are able to get sick very easy I would take it very seriously, even if other people do not. Use hand sanitiser and always wash your hands. Which I am sure you do any way. I would cancel his birthday party or politely ask your sister-in-law not to come since her kids are sick. Your 1 year old will never remember if he had a party or not, but you will always remember if you lost your baby because of an early labor.... I would just be super safe if I were you... Good luck!

    Answer by gibsongirl017 at 12:22 PM on May. 26, 2011