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Do you ever feel like you are the exception?

Do you ever feel like maybe you weren't meant to be a mom? Do you ever feel like your kids would have better lives if they had someone more loving to take care of them?

I'm constantly feeling like this. I wake up some days, like, I'm not meant for this... this is not what my life was supposed to be like. I think about leaving some days, but how could I do that to my kids... let alone my DH??? I'm not that selfish of a person, but it's just so hard. I'm either going through PPD or just plain old depressoin. I have no idea. I feel like.. how can I be responsible for taking care of other people when I can't even figure out what's wrong with me? I can't stand it.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:27 PM on Dec. 8, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • you know i was the same way and i am on medication for it now i didn't think i needed help but i was like i have 2 do this for me and my baby if i were you i would go and get some help

    Answer by butterscotch297 at 5:29 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I did feel like this at one point following the birth of my third child. I just wanted to drop the kids in someone else's more capable hands and run... it seemed like they would be better off and so would I. I realized that this was not how I wanted to feel and spoke to my doctor about it- she thought it could be PPD although I disagreed because I did not feel 'depressed.' She suggested I try an antidepressant and it helped immensely. I would definitely sit down and talk honestly with your doctor. I really have empathy for how you are feeling, I have been there too and am so glad that I got help for it.

    Answer by Freela at 5:32 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I think that way sometimes..... I grew up on a ranch in wyoming and I always swore I would never have anything to do with that life when I grew up!! I was going to go to chicago or new york city and be like the girls in sex in the city find some rich handsom guy and never have anything to do with the "country way of living" or any man who had anything to do with it!! Well here I am with 3 kids and another on the way living in a big white farm house in Illinois with my farmer boyfriend lol!! I do think god what happend to my dreams and who the hell am I and what am I doing in this hell hole of a farmland with all these damn kids..... but then I remember that I love them all so much when they are gone that I couldnt imagain living any other way!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 5:38 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I think there is not one of us out here that has ran for a gallon of milk looked at the horizon and thought I would love to just keep on driving until I ran out of interstate. Or woke up in our beds and thought OMG how did I get to this place...what has happened to my life...this is not how I thought it would be. But you are their mom and could never do a better job for them as they love you. I think it would help you if you got a little me time. People who never get away from the everyday can crack like a nut. Talk to your hubby, your mom, your friend. Get away for awhile. Do something for just you...on a regular basis.

    Answer by salexander at 8:50 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • I think everyone feels that way sometimes... even if it's just for a minute. My son was VERY premature and we nearly lost him... we lost his twin brother... so I have had a hard time prioritizing myself b/c we've had health issues to deal with. That also put on more pressure to help my survivor develop as well as possible... lots of pressure... but I'll tell you... even if it's an early morning workout you need to get out and do something for yourself. Exercise is also good to help regulate hormones & get your endorphins flowing. Just remember how precious your family is... YOU are what they need. You'll figure it out....

    Answer by AggieMamacita at 9:05 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • When I went thru PPD after the birth of my daughter, I had a similar feeling...more like "I don't know how to do this"...I felt like her babysitter instead of her mom and kept having feelings like "when are her real parents going to get her"...but even while I was having those feelings you could not have convinced me that someone else would have done a better job with her. It was odd, for feeling like that I never left her side and I never left her with a sitter...and the feelings did pass pretty quickly. If you're feeling like this constantly, you should probably see someone and get it straightened out because you're probably a fine mother and just feeling overwhelmed or having some other kind of issue.

    Answer by kabbot01 at 9:48 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • i had dreams i was killing my daughter after i ahd her it was the worst feeling EVER!! i couldn't control them though. I would have went crazy but my friend ZOLOFT came to the rescue. Two days and i was the happiest person in the world

    Answer by Cherish050307 at 10:37 PM on Dec. 8, 2008

  • Because I have children with special needs, I feel completely incapable most of the time. God obviously thought wrong if he thought I could handle it! I am not the happy-go-lucky person I used to be, and feel robbed of motherhood. I did all the right things, waiting to find Mr. Right, getting married in my 30's, owning a house, THEN having children, and yet, somehow, I was not destined to have typical children. It breaks my heart every time I see a typical child. I so wish I could experience those joys.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:29 PM on Dec. 9, 2008

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