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Is my daughter's crush on her coach normal or should I be concerned?

My 15 year old daughter has a crush on her rock climbing coach- she won't admit it but it is obvious. I am concerned as I cannot tell if he just thinks highly of her or if he "likes" her too. It is causing me concern as I am not sure of how to handle scheduling her 1 on 1 coaching sessions - I don't want to be paranoid but also do not want to be Polyanna-

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on May. 25, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (21)
  • Her crush would be normal I think. Scheduling one on one coaching sessions I would discourage and object to.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 3:14 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Normal a teenager having a crush on a guy is just going to happen.
    alainalee

    Answer by alainalee at 3:15 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • At that age it is tough. They think they know it all and can protect themselves from all of it. How old is the coach? If he is quite a bit older I might mention the crush to him and see how he reacts....of course don't tell your dd you are doing this.

    I might also talk to her though. Say hey I know he is hot or whatever....but he is a grown man. And he could get into LOTS of trouble if he had something going with you.
    Shaken1976

    Answer by Shaken1976 at 3:16 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • It's normal I think you should monitor it though!
    Dahis

    Answer by Dahis at 3:16 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Can you at least be present at these sessions? Just hang out, read a book. Out of the way?
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 3:32 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • One on One sessions shouldn't happen unless there will be other adults in the rock climbing area.
    As an adult that works with teenagers on a regular basis, I NEVER put myself in a situation where I am alone with someone that is not my child.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 6:12 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • I had a crush on one of my teachers when I was in high school. He was an awesome teacher and I got over the crush, but he was still (and even 7 years later) one of my favorite teachers. I did understand that it would never happen and why. For me, it was having a crush on a celebrity. I knew it would never happen, but still fun to think about. As far as the one on one goes, that depends if you are comfortable letting your daughter in a room alone with him. Could you maybe be in the room with them?
    kasey22

    Answer by kasey22 at 12:10 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • Her crush is normal. He is probably muscular if he is a coach. He also is a powerful male figure in her life who is being kind to her and teaching her things. Her attraction is normal. However, if you have any reason to think he feels the same way about her then you should confront him or ask that she become a member of a group class instead. Also make sure to ask her about each session casually. If she seems like she is hiding something or wont talk about it there may be a problem.
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 8:53 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • I love the idea that musicmom had about you bringing a book and sitting off to the side. If they want to know why you are staying just say "I want to see what you are doing. I am interested to see how it works." If she insists that you leave, point out that you pay for these lessons and you are her mother and can see what you are paying for if you want to.
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 8:56 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • I think its normal, can you sit in on the one on ones?
    sstepph

    Answer by sstepph at 9:25 AM on May. 26, 2011

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