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4 Bumps

Is it wrong of me?

I think I want to leave DH. We barely talk anymore, let alone anything else. He lives about 220 miles away b/c of work. Been down there since Aug 2010, so about 10 months now. I ask if he is coming home for a weekend or anything, and he says he can't afford to. Which I do all the finances, and believe me-he can.

We have 3 kids; 6,4, and 2. They are with me day in and day out. I have no family and no friends because we just bought a house thinking we'd all be together, or I guess I thought.

He doesn't call or respond to my txts anymore.

I am not even emotional, is it wrong? I just want to stop waiting for him and get on with our lives.

I am going to dental assisting school starting tonight, my hope is that I can get a job and support these kids.

I don't want him to be blind-sided, but somehow I don't feel like he will be.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:57 PM on May. 25, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • not trying to be harsh..but it sounds like you have already decided ...and i was wondering do you think he has moved on as well, because i couldnt imagine a person not wanting to come any chance they can get to be with their family!! good luck hun
    mztxdelta

    Answer by mztxdelta at 6:01 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • No, have you thought of renting the place or moving closer? or if he just does not want you , go for it. Continue your studies if its a case of him not wanting you. Right now you need a break and a {{{ hug}}}
    sweet11-12

    Answer by sweet11-12 at 6:03 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Move on. I think he already has. What is it with these men. They don't want their women but to not want to see their children?! Seriously I would text him one more time and tell him when and if he decides to come back his stuff will be packed. Before though, make sure he pays every month for the kids. That being said....it may just wake him up! If he thinks you will put him out it may help. He's over there thinking well we have a house to pay for and three kids? Nah she won't leave me. She can't. This will tell you once and for all whether there's anything left to fight for.
    DDWay

    Answer by DDWay at 6:07 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • He has said last year that he didn't think it was a good idea to live down there near him. We got married 7 years ago b/c he promised me the world, and for the last 7 years I've chased him in vain. I need a break.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:08 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Its not wrong of you. Normally I'm all for doing all you can to save a marriage Im just old fashioned like that but with him not willing to communicate or put any effort into it I would say move on. You can do EVERYTHING to try and save it but marriage is a 2 person kinda thing and if hes not willing to work on it then there's just no hope for it.
    Best wishes to you and your family....
    My_3_Babies

    Answer by My_3_Babies at 6:14 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • OK, Then do what you need to do. Send me a note if you wish. You need understanding. You will be OK . Rest , eat well, and you can do this.
    sweet11-12

    Answer by sweet11-12 at 6:14 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • My personal thoughts based solely on what you have shared right here/right now.

    There is no "right" or "wrong" in regards to your feelings or in regards to how to proceed in this particular situation.

    Instead of viewing it in terms of "right" or "wrong".. I would choose to view it in terms of reality of the situation, my feelings, my husband's feelings and the overall state of our marriage.It seems (again based only on what has been shared) that the distance and living 2 differently lives in essence has caused a disconnect between you and your husband.The options are as follows: be honest with your husband about your feelings & work with your husband (which BOTH must be willing to do) to bring yourselves back together in order to have a mutually happy/healthy marriage, live as is and be unhappy, or be honest with your husband about your feelings and tell him you would like to divorce and move on with your life.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:32 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • I wouuld finish school for sure if you plan on leaving i dought that he would be surprised that you want the leave just surprised that you are move on their great men out thier talk to him again but that does'nt work move on. Good Luck.
    Betutah

    Answer by Betutah at 6:33 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • No I do not think its wrong of you.Sometimes us moms have to put our needs first and do what we know is right and best,Keep it moving girly.
    Brandy928

    Answer by Brandy928 at 6:56 PM on May. 25, 2011

  • Leave babygirl
    benitaapplebomb

    Answer by benitaapplebomb at 9:07 PM on May. 25, 2011

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