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5 Bumps

How do I show my DH that I'm angry.?

He went over to a friends house Monday, Tuesday, and lastnight. He said he would be home Shortly atfer his normal time... didnt hear from him until almost 9 pm.. His NORMAL time is 5:15-5:30... ok So when he called I had gotten my kids up to go to his friends house to look for him.. I called his phone 7 times with in this 6 hr time frame, I also called his friends phone with no answer.. So I put the kids back to bed, And he said that at he would be home shortly (he called at 8:50ish) he didnt get home until 11:30ish.
i know he didnt cheat because I called his friend and his friends son (he is 25) all three had the same story and its normal for him to do this around that friend. Anyway I am BEYOND hurt, angry, PISSED off and just plain unwanted as nothing other than a maid, wife, mother...
HOW do I get him to understand where I am at with my feelings....?
Thank you !!

Answer Question

Asked by Dork4Fish at 10:56 AM on May. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,099 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • I'd tell him, straightout, not holding back my true feeling..NOT yelling or accusing, just telling him how I feel. Good luck

    Answer by meooma at 10:58 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • You could print your question and share it with him - or forward it to him as an email.

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 10:59 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • Sit down and talk with him about it. Don't make it a passing conversation. Make a time to sit, just you and him, no kids around. Tell him how it makes you feel when he does this.

    Ask him how he would feel if you left him home and didn't come home when you told him you would.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:59 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • UUUUU Yell at him, is a good way. Stop doing anything for him, cooking for him, washing his cloths, cleaning up his messes, sex. Tell him how you feel.

    Answer by louise2 at 11:01 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • Talk to him.

    Answer by August07Mom at 11:02 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • What's normal for him to do around that friend? Stay out later than he tells you? Just tell him its not acceptable, he has a family and you come first. If he doesn't get it then pack his crap and say goodbye, that will send a clear messge. You cannot just hint or beat around the bush with men. Gl to you

    Answer by yesmaam at 11:03 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • I would say I am very angry with you, how would you feel if I didn't come home? I would say 3 nights a week is way too many to spend away from our family, so dear hubby your choice is to cool your jets or go and live with your friend!

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:03 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • Talk to him. Don't scream, yell, or be condescending. Tell him very calmly how you feel. Most men don't get it any other way.

    Answer by alexsmomma06 at 11:03 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • You don't need to "show" him your anger, but you do need to tell him about it. You also need to make there be some consequences for his very immature and thoughtless behavior. Only you know what you would have to do in order to make your point that this kind of behavior will no longer be tolerated. There's a very good book entitled BOUNDARIES IN MARRIAGE by Drs. John Townsend and Henry Cloud that I think would be a really big help to you in knowing how to set and enforce some boundaries with your husband. Right now, he is behaving like an independent, unattached school boy while you are bearing the responsibility of family. These kinds of things ought not to be. He will never grow up as long as you overlook his bad behavior. If he's going to behave as a child, then you should treat him the way you would any other child. Then you tell him that the next time he doesn't come home, this will be what happens as a result.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:08 AM on May. 26, 2011

  • Throw a frying pan at him.....just kidding...

    My hubby does this sometimes. It is really freakin irritating. Feels like he puts his friends ahead of us/you... I talked till I was blue in the face. It didn't change a thing. The thing that worked for me was telling him I needed to run some errands without the kiddo. I gave him a time I would be back....then I missed it by a few hours. Basically I gave him a taste of his own medicine. When I got home he was acting all pissy about me being late till I reminded him of all the times he had done it to me. I stayed calm and rational and he saw my point. Now he is on time much more often.

    Answer by Shaken1976 at 11:09 AM on May. 26, 2011

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