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4 Bumps

Not girly enough...

I am seriously so horrible at being a girl!! DH wishes that I was more girly and wear heels, accessorize, get manicures and pedicures...all of that! But, I seriously don't know how! I honestly didn't start wearing makeup until I got out of high school. In high school, the only thing I wore was concealer and powder. After HS, I still pretty much did the same thing with my hair and makeup. I didn't really know what to do with my hair other than straighten it, so I would always wear it up in a ponytail. Now, I've learned about hair and makeup from YouTube (my saving grace!!) and honestly feel I do a pretty good job now with hair and make up, but he still feels like I can do more with my appearance. Don't get me wrong, DH does love me the way that I am regardless, and still tells me I'm hot in jeans and a tshirt, but I know a part of him wishes I would be willing to shop at stores in the mall, not just target and walmart. I am horrible with shoes. I have one pair of flip flops, one pair of flats, and one pair of heels for the occasional wedding. And that's it. DH hates it! lol But, I just feel weird! Do you think it's just a confidence issue that I have? I always feel like I can't pull off any of the nice clothes that other ladies wear so well!


Asked by jalvarez626 at 12:04 PM on May. 26, 2011 in Beauty & Style

Level 10 (489 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • Dude, I can relate.
    I'm what I like to call "a natural frump", a situation not aided by the facts that I wear scrubs at work and I went to a Catholic boarding high school on top of a mountain surrounded by nuns bent on preventing a single one of us from getting knocked up and so makeup was forbidden and the uniform was designed to be so unflattering that it would cause people to turn to stone if they looked directly at us. I don't own a single piece of non-work clothing that doesn't have baby-urp stains on the left shoulder and all my makeup is the same stuff I bought for the wedding when we got married 12 years ago. I honestly wish Clinton and Stacy from "What Not To Wear" would come and bust me and show me how to put outfits together properly!

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 12:43 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I think I'd ask him why he wants you to change. He married you knowing who you are and he should accept and love you for that not wish that you were someone else.

    Answer by Octobersmom at 12:10 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • My dh met me, and feel in love with me, the way I am. He knew what he was getting. Your dh should feel lucky to have you as you are. Change for nobody but yourself. If you want to change something fine, but do not do it for someone else.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 12:19 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • What about shopping online for things that you can throw on and do your errands in but that are still feminie such as:

    Peasant skirts (which can be worn with Tees, tanks or sweaters:

    Casual Dresses:

    Feminine tops to go with your jeans:



    Answer by Octobersmom at 1:11 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I wear nikes and sometimes heals but I always wear makeup and do my hair or keep it cut a certain way. You can do it just pick something that works for you something that makes you feel feminine and work it.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:08 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I don't think it's a confident issue at all. Don't worry about trying to pull off what you see on others ... find your own style and go for clothes/styles that flatter you, your body type, and your lifestyle.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:09 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Octobersmom: I know it seems like he is wanting me to change. But, he's really not. He's not always on me about my appearance, in fact, he hardly ever is. I just know that once in awhile, he wishes I would wear a skirt instead of just jeans!

    I think I make excuses alot about it, too. I am literally busy from sun up to sun down. And so I just always say I'm too busy, or I don't have time. I know it won't kill me to take 30 minutes out of my day to do something more with myself, but I just never make the time for it.

    Comment by jalvarez626 (original poster) at 12:14 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I'm kinda like you so I understand. Maybe occasionally you could "surprise" him with a skirt or something when you're feeling up to it. Sometimes I wear things more for DH than for me. On a regular day, though I wouldn't worry about it.

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 12:17 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Okay, I know it's my fault. The way I wrote it does make it seem like DH is wanting me to change. Let me reiterate, he doesn't want me to change. We've been together since we were 14, so that was way before makeup and hair came into play! He wanted me back in my frizzy wavy hair days and horrible under eye circles years, so I know we're good! He'd just like to see me actually use a nice purse, not just a wallet and put my keys and phone in my pocket!

    Comment by jalvarez626 (original poster) at 12:26 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • My husband told me to stop being so formal with my wardrobe. Now I wear jeans and jc sportswear and tees. He actually tells me to tone it down. I wish I had that problem,cuz I've doing makeunders for myself for a long time. Just wear heels and a dark shade of gloss and always make sure to have polish on. I also would suggest wearing slogans or writing or some sort of label. For some reason, you will look dressier believe me I have been doing this for a very long time..........

    Answer by geminilove7 at 12:48 PM on May. 26, 2011