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MY MIL

So last week she asked my DH to drive her home from work every day (they work at the same place but it would be about 30-45 min out of his way each time). This is after his family has ignored him for a year , only a hand full of them even showed up to our wedding. Anyway so he told her he would but he would need her to reimburse him the extra gas money it would take to get her home. His mother had the nerve to say " if you can't afford to do your mother a favor, maybe your wife needs to get a job". Currently I am a SAHM, I get child support for my 4 year old and I am pregnant. I also go to school. We both felt it would be best for me to stay at home until all our kids are in school because child care is so expensive. We could afford not to charge her gas money but it would be close to $100 a month and that's a big favor for someone who has nothing to do with us. Was she out of line for what she said???

Answer Question
 
JLS2388

Asked by JLS2388 at 2:44 PM on May. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 25 (25,280 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • IMO, yes. The set up you and your DH have is none of her business and she can't expect you to jump up, disrupt that set up and get a job so that your DH can give her free rides. If she lived by you, i'd understand it but with such a long commute out of his way, i'd say help pay or no way. Gas is not cheap!
    Marix3

    Answer by Marix3 at 2:53 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • This is more than a favor if she wants him to do it on a regular basis. If it was the occasional ride home, then he could do it for free but to do it everyday and not get some help with gas money seems out of line.
    nmmama09

    Answer by nmmama09 at 3:07 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • She was absolutely out of line. 30-45 minutes is a long drive, she can pay or take the bus...her choice.
    GomezMami2908

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 3:11 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Wow, she never once asked to pay for gas? Seems a little out of line and disrespectful, I would be extremely grateful to my son in law or daughter for driving and I wouldn't think twice if gas money was a issue.
    PatriciaofMN

    Answer by PatriciaofMN at 3:13 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Oh wow, that was way over the line. A favor is a one time thing, not every day for a week 30-40 minutes out of one's way, relative or not. My mom would ask me to pick her up from work occasionally before I got married but always either gave me money for gas, even though her job was not much farther than my apartment, or asked if I needed anything from the store. I think your MIL was extremely rude and whether you have a job or not is none of her business.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 3:14 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Let her walk. B*tch.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:14 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I definitely think she was out of line for what she said. It isn't fair to expect him to give up the time AND the money to take her home every day. If it was once here and there it might be a different story, but even then, whatever budget the two of you have worked on clearly didn't include her transportation costs, nor should it. Sounds like she was just being nasty and your DH should not give into that.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 3:42 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • The family set up is none of her business! I'd tell her that if she starts acting like a supportive, loving mother THEN she would deserve favors. But $100 a month to a wonderful loving supportive family member is still a huge favor to ask IMO
    hill_star03

    Answer by hill_star03 at 3:50 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • That's when you say fine if you don' thelp w gas ride the damn bus or walk either way we don't care you've never had nothing to do wit h us before you needed something and now you want us to cater to you it's not happenin!
    chica679

    Answer by chica679 at 6:06 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • has she always been like this? after I read posts like this I always want to send my MIL a big bunch of flowers!
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 8:26 PM on May. 26, 2011

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