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3 Bumps

41 Things That Every Guy Wishes That Women Knew

My dh sent me this list... trying to hint at something I guess LoL


1. If you think you might be fat, you are. Don’t ask us. Just get your fat ass in a gym.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it’s up put it down.
3. Don’t cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he’s not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don’t ask him what he’s thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it’s not different, it’s just like every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don’t expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and your Dad probably is too.
17. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don’t work.
18. No, he doesn’t know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
19. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We’re bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
21. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn’t have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don’t give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don’t fake it. We’d rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.
29. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
30. If you don’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
33. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done – not both.
34. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
35. Christopher Columbus didn’t need directions, and neither do we.
36. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
37. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.
38. Telling us that the models in the men’s magazines are airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it’s certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.
39. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.
40. Anyone can buy condoms.
AND FINALLY,
41. Don’t rub the lamp if you don’t want the genie to come out.




****What do you ladies think? I actually found some of this pretty humorous

 
4xsthetrouble

Asked by 4xsthetrouble at 7:11 PM on May. 26, 2011 in Just for Fun

Level 21 (11,387 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • My husband only agreed with 6 of them. Guess I married a woman. A giant, hairy woman.


    :D
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 7:21 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • Lol I must be a guy because the whole time I was agreeing with almost all of them.
    SMITxsM2

    Answer by SMITxsM2 at 11:59 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I found several of them funny....thanks for sharing.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 7:15 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • LOL! Tahks funny Espcially 15 & 19
    Zarviemom19

    Answer by Zarviemom19 at 7:23 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • I found quite a few to be funny. Thanks for sharing.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 7:42 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • lol
    smurfyangel

    Answer by smurfyangel at 11:16 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • That was hilarious! My husband agreed to quite a few of them.
    GomezMami2908

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 11:25 PM on May. 26, 2011

  • My DF thought they were funny
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 4:49 PM on May. 27, 2011