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3 Bumps

Can a man change his bad habits?

I met a man and I have been having sex with him for about 4 months now. He recently admitted to me how he wanted me and my son to move in with him because he never felt so connected to someone. He treats me good, he doesn't lie, he isn't jealious, he has manners, he is good with my son, and he has a steady job. The thing is he drinks a lot and admitted to me he took 10 zoloft with alcohol because he was so depressed. I told him that I do care for him but he needs to change his ways in order for me to ever consider of being with him and possibly move in with him He said that he thinks I am the person that will give him reason to change his ways. Is it a hopeless cause to think he will change?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:04 AM on May. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • yeah... I wouldnt be moving my child in with an alcoholic pill popper no matter how good the sex is.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:05 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • I'm surprised you're already engaging in sex with him.
    zboys

    Answer by zboys at 1:08 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • Only if he wants to, just you telling him won't work. If he has been drinking a long time its very doubtful he will stop. You can just express your cocern Good luck honey most men don't like if a woman tries to change them a little advice,but you know how much you can take.
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 1:10 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • no they dont change , maybe some do at first of being together but dont last long
    letstalk747

    Answer by letstalk747 at 1:11 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • Sorry forgot to put the (period) behind concern.
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 1:12 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • He can't use you as his excuse to stop. If he does and it doesn't work out then he'll blame you for him going back to drinking. He has to want to do it for himself. Obviously he doesn't care enough about himself to stop. I wouldn't move in. I wouldn't have my child living in that environment until he cleans his act up but remember that it will be a constant struggle. Misusing meds and drinking sounds like his addiction. He should go to AA and NA or get help somewhere before it goes much further. And please don't get pregnant by this man. He may ask you to just to keep you in his chaotic world. (been there, done that) It took me years but I finally got out and won't fall for it again. Addicts are charming and persuasive until they get control of your life and screw it up. They are cons and good at it so don't be fooled. Enjoy the sex just use bc.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:14 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • It is never a good idea to move in with a guy who drinks alot and abuses pills. Yes a man can change but he has to WANT to and before you move in allow him to prove himself first
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 1:16 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • Yes, people do change.
    Helen2004

    Answer by Helen2004 at 1:17 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • You should not allow your child any contact what so ever with this person. He should not touch your son's life.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 1:33 AM on May. 27, 2011

  • Agree with tootoobusy
    stace101

    Answer by stace101 at 7:20 AM on May. 27, 2011

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