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How do i handle this situation?

My SIL went into labor today and called me to let me know. I told her mom (which I am staying with right now while hubby is deployed) and waited for an update. Throughout the day she or her boyfriend would text me to let me know her progress. I would let her mom know everytime I got an updayte, but she never once called her mom or anyone else in the family to let them know what was going on. I felt bad all day, but still continued to give updates as I knew them. She and her boyfriend texted me when baby was born and sent me pictures. Once again they never informed her mom or dad or sent them any pictures. My SIL gave birth at 8 pm and finally called her mom and dad at 10. Well, my in laws are very upset in which I don't blame them! My MIL doesn't even want to talk to her. I feel like the bad guy because she did keep me informed. My MIL will leave the room when she is talking to someone on the phone about it and it is really making me feel awful. I feel like I did something wrong. I just don't know how to deal with this situation. I am getting so upset because I feel as though she doesn't want to say anything around me in fear that I may tell my SIL which is not the case. I totally agree that it was terrible of my SIL to do this to her parents and family and I do not at all feel as though I rank above them at all. :( what do I do?


Asked by Anonymous at 11:55 PM on May. 28, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • unfortunately there is not much u can do besides explain to both sides that u r not on either side and that u hope that they can work it out and that u will be there for everyone!!! it will be ok and work out but in the mean time u should try to stay outta the middle of things from now on cuz in the end it could come back to have u being the complete bad guy and ur the one who gets hurt in the end!!! good luck and congrats on the new niece/nephew...

    Answer by NOWLIN8408 at 12:00 AM on May. 29, 2011

  • idk
    I imagine they told you because you would inform everyone else, one call is better than making 3-4 calls when you are in labor

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 12:01 AM on May. 29, 2011

  • Stay out of it. Next time your SIL puts you in this position, tell her to grow up and handle her own communications with your MIL. your priority should be to respect your MIL, given your living arrangement.

    Answer by dullscissors at 12:01 AM on May. 29, 2011

  • She never asked me to tell her mom. I did because I thought she had the right to know.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:06 AM on May. 29, 2011

  • Whatever her reasonings which it very well could have been that she figured I would inform everyone. She really should have been texting and calling her mom all day, but that wasn't the case...

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:08 AM on May. 29, 2011

  • Why didn't your SIL call her own mom and dad? It does make you wonder what her reasoning is. Tell your MIL that if she wants to know why her DIL or her son didn't call her with some information that she should ask them. It's not your fault. For whatever reason they chose not to tell them, they should tell her why. If something is going on that you don't know about tell them that you don't want to be put in the middle. It's not fair to you.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:25 AM on May. 29, 2011