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I need help with fine tuning a report

I can not fgure out how I want to word this or who my audience is. Well my general audience is the class but who specifically I am trying to reach is where I have the trouble.

I am writing a paper on discrimination in the workplace - natural hair for african american women. I want to know do african american women face pressure to conform to an anglo hairstyle (chemically process, heat straighten, wigs/weaves) or are they free enough to wear their hair natural? Also is there a difference in the job (white collar vs non white collar jobs).

1. How can I shrink that wording down to something more streamline?
2. I don't know f I should use the job status as part of the title or include it in the body.
3. My audience I don't know if I am writing this paper for people who are considering going natural or not.

(Nautral hair for AA women - chemically free, weaveless, and no wigs. They are wearing the hair that God gave them)

The class is Business Communication and hte teacher said the genral audience is the class but we should have a target audience we are writing this for. I am not asking anyone to write my paper just some helpful insight that I may be missing.

Answer Question

Asked by Jazmineamomma at 2:55 PM on May. 29, 2011 in

Level 18 (5,302 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • Is it a report or a speech (I ask because of the mention of your audience)? It makes a difference in how you phrase things.

    Answer by NotPanicking at 3:20 PM on May. 29, 2011

  • I am curious what you mean when you say natural AA hair? I mean I have friends who are AA and they can go ALL OUT with their hair sometimes. Color, shape, design! Sometimes it's so amazing I am thinking the hairstylist has a dregree in engineering and architecture! So, like if a caucasion woman where to die her hair an out of the norm color of cut (think shaved or mohawk) would be out for the normal office work space, I would think some of the more over the top AA designs would be too.

    Answer by momof030404 at 3:27 PM on May. 29, 2011

  • Well , I suppose that a target audience could be managers who recruit and train staff who will be dealing with the public for positions where dress and grooming are iimportant but should not in any way be perceived as discriminatory

    Answer by janet116 at 11:55 PM on May. 29, 2011

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