I just don't know what to do. My son was on such a nice path when he started college, but missed his first paper and it was downwards from there. He didn't get good enough grades to quality for his grant and we can't nor will I pay for private college for someone I don't feel has the umph to keep on the right track right now.
He says he's trying to get a job, been "trying" since December...but hasn't... He's most nights and sleeps til mid-day and disrespectul I could just strangle him!
Every week for I can't remember how long I've been trying to get my husband on the same gameplan, but he won't discipline him. I tell my husband he won't be forced to work til he has no money. It's breaking our marriage apart and I'm the BAD MOM while my husband comes out looking like a rose. Yesterday, AGAIN he put some gas in the kids car with a promise when I caught him that my son would be doing chores to pay it off today. So, of course he wakes up at 1pm ready to go to the concert with my husband and his 2 friends. In walks 2 of my sons friends and I have a break down in front of everyone. My husband gets so angry that I'm discussing this he breaks his reading glasses.
He gives the boys the tickets to the concert (without my knowledge at teh time) and now my son and his 2 friends are at the concert while I'm stuck at home with a husband who's impossible to want to be around.
I'm going to get my son's car, which we bought for him to attend college and drive it over to a friends house. I'm the only one in this house that seems to care if my son gets on with his life or not. My husband thinks I'm being mean by not giving him a fun day. This is the same son that was out til 2am partying on the gas my husband put in his car... he woke up at 1pm today just in time to leave with my husband and his 2 friends til I made a stink. Of course no chores done by the son.
I can't take it anymore. I want to just leave. My husband is so upset he said he wants to leave. He says he just can't take the controversy of being a parent. I get lied to my face all the time and I'm looking like the bad person in this family.
I'm so upset. I just don't know what to do. It's been MONTHS and no results because my husband keeps coddling this kid.
I can't turn his phone off because he "might" get a call from one of the few places he's put an application in with. I have asked him to go work ANYwhere and told him of places that are hiring, but he feels they're not good places to work. The one interview he did have he slept through because apparently my husband was to wake him, but forgot to.
He could work for me, but he hats me and won't work for me at my company.
I tried to kick him out, he came home that night saying he had nowhere to stay and my husband won't let me keep him out of the house.
I know I shouldn't say this but I don't like my son or my husband. I have another adult son who's got special needs and works for me who wants to try school again and will probably fail that I need to help. I'm way over my head. I tried bringing the one able minded/bodied son to a counselor, that didn't do anything but make me more angry because it didn't help me and she young seemed easily manipulated. My son is VERY good at manipulating people. He went through high school lying and manipulating people to get what he wanted. He finally ran into someone in college that wouldn't allow it and gave him his first dose of reality. Thus the reason he's not going to school now.
He's managed to turn my husband against me. I don't know what stories he's told his girlfriends parents but I've been getting test messages basicially stating he's got a bad mother and had a hard life. This is a kid who's gotten everything he's wanted.
I hope some of this has made sense.
Asked by Anonymous at 5:21 PM on May. 29, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)
Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 5:23 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by emmyandlisa at 5:31 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 5:33 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by ClaudiaJ at 5:47 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 6:21 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by SpiritedWitch at 6:36 PM on May. 29, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 7:15 PM on May. 29, 2011