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**advice please** adult content

I've been working hard for eight years at college full time. I'm 3 years away from finishing my PhD. I have two children under the age of five. Tomorrow I have a job interview. In August I start another job. For four years I've been little miss homemaker while my husband worked and played. I have had jobs, but they've been part time and temporary or working from home for minimal pay. I don't wash the dishes every single day, don't wash the laundry every day, and forget to take the trash out to the curb sometimes, but our kids are healthy and none of us are malnourished. I have dinner on the table every night and I even suck his cock on demand.

He chooses tonight to tell me that he does love me, but does not want to live with me anymore and his only reason is that I don't keep the house spotless. Now he's reading a comic book and I'm silently cycling between sobs and rage.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:13 AM on May. 31, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • OMG!! I am so sorry!! What are you going to do? He sounds ungreatful for all that you do. Do you have family or friends you could say with for a bit? That might teach him a lesson and he will see how much you do. So, what does he want? What do you want?
    I am sending lots of prayers your way...if you need someone to talk to, feel free to message me!! Good luck mama!!
    mkdirector2011

    Answer by mkdirector2011 at 5:23 AM on May. 31, 2011

  • I am sorry you are dealing w/ this. It's not about the housework. Believe me, most men are clutter blind! :p Maybe he feels threatened by your academic achievements. Having a PhD is a big deal! How far did he get in his education? Either way, I would insist on counseling to get to the real root of his feelings. Then you can make decisions from there. I wish you the best of luck. It sounds like you have your act together, so no matter what happens, I'm sure you'll land on your feet! *Hugs* :)
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 6:49 AM on May. 31, 2011

  • Im afraid I agree with mrsmom above; I can't imagine a man being concerned about how dirty a house is (if it looks dirty to you it's probably only slightly unclean to him!). But in my experience men ARE concerned about us being more successful than them. If you can't sit down and talk to him (and to me, he doesn't sound like the kind of guy you CAN talk to), then I guess you'll be best with counselling.
    Speaking purely from my own experiences however, if he's said something like that, I'd have to question my own feelings and my own future with him.
    stace101

    Answer by stace101 at 8:02 AM on May. 31, 2011

  • You don't keep the house clean enough. Riiiiiiiight...

    Okay, here's what you do. Find or take a day off, a day when he's home and available. Put the kids with a sitter. Say to him "Well okay, now we have a chance to get on top of this house situation!" Hand him a bucket and a pair of rubber gloves and the two of you work like crazy all day and get the house "spotless". Then you sit down with him and make up a chore list together with equal division of labor, so you guys can stay on top of things.

    Then, you wait and see what, if anything, he has to say.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 9:09 AM on May. 31, 2011

  • oh honey you dont deserve that he is wrong for saying that to you yeah one day you should go some where to your friends house or family house & then he realizes how much you do around the house goodluck i hope everything works out for you
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 10:34 AM on May. 31, 2011

  • I'm so sorry you're going though this. I don't believe that's the real reason though - I'd get it out of him.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 4:28 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Thanks ladies. I'm sorry I didn't get back to this questions sooner. As it turns out, his real reason was a new girlfriend...

    Me and the kids are doing okay though, living 2,000mi away from him and now the only issues are how quickly the divorce can be finalized and enforcing child support. He told me in a text last night that I had no life goals, yet his world's been falling apart since I left.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:06 PM on Nov. 16, 2011

  • little miss homemaker does the dishes daily. lol.
    guess its a good thing you might be getting a job.
    notjstasocermom

    Answer by notjstasocermom at 9:18 AM on May. 31, 2011

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