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HELP! my 2.5 year old son wont stop hitting other kids...what do i do?

My son is 2.5 and in the last few months has started hitting kids older than him.... he does not do it to kids smaller than him or his age only the older ones... When the kids ask him to stop he just keeps doing it and when i tell him to stop he just ignores me... We have tried the time out...it does not work... we have tried to talk to him to let him know what he did hurts others... and its almost as if he does it to hurt them on purpose .... I just dont know what to do about it... any advice?

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jaksonsmommy

Asked by jaksonsmommy at 12:44 PM on May. 31, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 16 (2,610 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Be consistent with the time outs. Eventually he will get it.
    jamesesmommy

    Answer by jamesesmommy at 12:49 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • I would be spanking his behind and telling him that he is loved way too much to let that kind of behavior go unpunished. The basic problem is lack of respect for you and for others, and he is also rebelling against your authority in his life. Mom is supposed to be in charge, and she is to be obeyed--instantly, without debate or disgust. The younger you teach him that what you say goes, the more peaceful your home is going to be. The opposite end of the spectrum is that you and everybody else is eventually going to dread being in this child's presence because of his disregard for authority and his disrespect of other people. I would start today teaching him that there are new rules at our house, and that he is to be under the authority of those older and wiser than he. We spanked for two things: disrespect and disobedience. Our children are grown and they are wonderful human beings, so I feel like it worked!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:49 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Are the older kids provoking him at all or is he just randomly hitting them and not stopping?
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 12:50 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • He is just randomly hitting them.... Usually when they are just sitting and playing or just watching tv...any time.. i have watched to see if he gets provoked and he does not... he just randomly hits them
    jaksonsmommy

    Comment by jaksonsmommy (original poster) at 12:52 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Before you go places remind you son hands to yourself. Let him know if he hits your leaving, and if he hits remove him from the situation and go home. Maybe your son gets frustrated with the older children and does not have the words to express his feelings so he hits to get their attention. Teach your son power words to use instead of hitting.
    mommiedear

    Answer by mommiedear at 12:54 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • can you tell before hand that aggressive behavior at all? Just curios. my son was never a hitter so I am just trying to see if there are signs before ? Had any older kid ever hurt him before this? I know my son gets very aggressive and he clenches his teeth and tries to tackle us / hit but just playful but you can see it in his face and he almost grits his teeth, he is VERY active and I think the burst of testosterone or something must hit him like that - not sure but we try to run it out and my sister thought it was a good idea for him to hit a pillow when he feels like hitting, at least its being directed somewhere else...
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 12:55 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • maybe your son just wants the older kids to include him?
    mommiedear

    Answer by mommiedear at 12:56 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • i watch kids at my house and my 2 younger sisters also come here... it just seems so random...one minute hes freindswith them the next hes hitting them...
    jaksonsmommy

    Comment by jaksonsmommy (original poster) at 12:59 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • I asked a few male perspectives on this, and this is what I got (my hubby too):
    If you tried a little reasoning with him and did the lighter punishment and those didnt work, then its time for fear. Your son has to learn early on there are consequences. Its time to whoop that butt . My brother always said he spanked if his son endangered himself or others. This is definitely in that category.

    Im pregnant and this is my first, so I dont have any "on the job" wisdom as of yet ;) Thank you for asking the question for you AND me! I got some good advice too ;)
    itsaboutime

    Answer by itsaboutime at 1:00 PM on May. 31, 2011

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