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Is there an effective punishment for a teenager?

my daughter is 14yrs old  she is always late coming in the house.   She never gives me a truthfull answer where she would be.  I would call her friend that she told me she was with... and her girlfriend would say.. she left me 3hrs ago to meet up with her boyfriend. liar

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Asked by Donna617 at 2:10 PM on May. 31, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 2 (12 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • How is she getting to these places? At 14 if I wanted to go anywhere I had to ask my mom for a ride. If she is continuously coming in late then it sounds like she should have the privilege taken away.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 2:13 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Since she can't be trusted, she should not be allowed to go anywhere for a while and then, thereafter, only if you take her there and pick her up personally.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:13 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Yeah, I told my daughter that she couldn't have a boyfriend until 16. Any "friends" that were boys when she was 14, I had to know the parents before she was allowed inside their house. Call me strict but I never had these issues and she is almost 17 and sticks with the rules I gave her because the alternatives would make her life very boring. Good luck and don't be afraid to disipline her, you're her parent and thats within your rights! :)

    Answer by Danishlady at 2:23 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • The first time I did anything like that I would have gotten lectured until my parents were blue in the face, not yelled at but more of the Now we can not trust you, you disappointed us and let us down, what if something happened to you or to us and we needed to reach you and didn't know where you were, etc. And then I would have been grounded- no phone, no going out after school or on weekends for at least two weeks. And when I was allowed back out to hang with friends my parents would have been checking up. If you don't reign her in now, she is going to be hell on wheels in another couple of years. Take things away for lying and disobeying your rules- her freedom to hang out, her phone, her computer, allowance, etc. It's time for the tough love, I think.

    Answer by MaryMW at 2:27 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Why are you letting her out of the house? It is that simple.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 3:19 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Sounds like she needs to work on being trustworthy. I would definitely make this an issue of trust and responsibility. If it were my boys they would not be allowed to go anywhere for awhile, and as another posted suggested, I would be taking them and picking them up once I was ready to allow it. I would also suggest that her friends come to your house moving forward, no going anywhere.
    If she can't be trusted to be where she is suppose to be then she shouldn't be going out. That is the one thing I've told my children, I need to know who, where, when and what when they go anywhere. They also know they have to check in if plans change to get permission. I think they are easy enough rules to follow, if she can't all freedom ends. Good Luck.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 3:19 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • I'd go back to swatting. That's what my dad had to do with me. Maybe even figure out a way to padlock her window and tell her she is grounded to her room until she decides to start telling the truth.

    Answer by malexander2009 at 4:57 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Don't let her go anywhere. If she can't tell the truth and come home one time then she should lose the right to go out.

    Answer by aj23 at 11:31 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Take away the "access to their world" - all electronics including phone and computer (lock it with a screen saver). Take the door off (put it in the garage) people that cannot be trusted do not get privacy. It works fast.

    Answer by cookiecutter17 at 12:06 AM on Jun. 1, 2011

  • Um, yes....ground her, keep her at home, take away her cell phone, etc. until she earns back your trust! Period. And yes, I HAVE raised teens. My sons are 19, 20, 23 and 24.

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 1:45 AM on Jun. 1, 2011

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