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Hard to have a relationship with a rude sister in law....

I was always excited that one day my brother would get married and his wife and I would be close friends ( you know, like sisters)...

Last winter he got married ( and they are having a baby) ... we are far from having a sisterly relationship... but not because I havent tried, also I understand not alot of people want that kind of relationship or really care, but the few times that we do talk she will say something about us being close and she also tells people that we are....

I see her probably once every couple of months ... we will make plans to do something, or for me to come over or her to come here and she always makes up some excuse at the last minute.

For example, today : I asked her last week if we ( me and my kids ) could come over for a bit because I had got the baby some things, so it was all set up, then right before I left she sent me a text saying " she forgot she has to work today" ... so I went and got my mom and still made the best of the day ( we were going out to lunch and stuff) ...

Their house is right in town, on the main road, so whenever you go somehwere, you usually go past there house... on the way to the reastraunt , we passed it and seen her and one of her friends on the porch...

so my m0m said to pull back around so we could still give her the baby stuff....

we pulled up and she was like " Oh yeah, I got called off of work...", but by the way she looked I could tell she made up a lie...

she does this all the time, and we never spend time together, but then when we actually do talk she will complain that I never come over or out with her... AND she also complains to other family memebers or mutal friends saying the same thing... I am about to just give up and stop playing this game !

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:01 PM on May. 31, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • I like your last sentence.. Don't give her soo much of your energy. Use it on people that want to be around you.
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 9:08 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • I am sorry your SIL has NO manners what-so-ever. But it does bring me to a question, if you know she blatantly made up a lie to get out of spending time with you, why would you still want a relationship with her?
    If it were me I would cut my losses and find a close girlfriend to ham it up with. Someone who respects you as a person cuz this girl obviously does not! Everyone deserves to be treated with respect in my eyes.
    Good Luck!!
    SaturnsMom

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 9:10 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • your sil sounds like a bitch, take it from someone who has been there, run the other direction and don't look back.
    momto4girzls

    Answer by momto4girzls at 9:13 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • In an ideal world, it would be nice if we were all like sisters with our SILs.... but it's not an ideal world (coming from someone who hasn't seen her own SIL for six months or more!) Why would you want a close friendship with someone who doesn't reciprocate? Be civil and respectful because she is your brother's wife, but leave it at that. That's my take on the IL thing generally.
    Freela

    Answer by Freela at 9:16 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Call her on it. In front of people. I sound so childish. But, she won't just stop unless she has too. And what she's doing is obviously getting to you. If you call her on it in front of people, she will have no choice BUT to stop it.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 9:22 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • Stop playing the game. Or like a PP suggested, call her on her lies in front of everyone. You're the kind of SIL I would love to have.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 PM on May. 31, 2011

  • stop trying to be her sister or friend. let her come to you now. obviously you've tried to make the relationship fun and wanting to be there for her and she is for whatever reason being an a**. if she makes those comments again, just say "well every time i try to visit you or get to together you cancel at the last minute" see what she says. don't feel bad either about saying it. show her how you feel.
    lucky35

    Answer by lucky35 at 2:48 PM on Jun. 1, 2011

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