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Anyone else realize that having kids may not have been the smartest choice?

I love my kids, but I honestly don't enjoy being a parent. It's has much more bad days than good. As my oldest (7) is in here throwing a fit (screaming, yelling, and completely acting a fool) I'm sitting here trying to figure out why I decided to have children in the first place. *sigh*

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Jun. 2, 2011 in General Parenting

Answers (11)
  • ahh... MAybe you are just having a bad day.. I honestly did feel like that the first year but I also had a colicky miserable baby and I had PPD and bonding issues.. he's 3-1/2 and I can't imagine life without him now.. BUT.. I know he WILL be an only because I know I wouldn't be a good mommy to more than!~ I hope your day gets better

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:20 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • Aw I know some days are rougher than others, but being a parent is a gift and having a child is really awesome. Maybe you need to plan a little something out of the house or with a friend. Sometimes just the little break helps so much.

    Answer by Sarahbeth7 at 4:20 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • well I can actually say I have never felt that way but that is not unusual!!!! If I could go back in time I would have not had any ONLY because their lives ahead of them is going to be sooooo difficult. They will grow out of the temper tantrums and when they become pre adults they really are GREAT GL

    Answer by buttonlts at 4:21 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • Buttinlts- question?.. why is having an only going to give them a difficult life ahead of them? just curious being I have an only,

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:23 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • I agree with Sarabeth7. Take a deep breath and see if you can turn your day around but doing something fun, even if it's just going to the park for a little bit and having snack or lunch there. :)

    Answer by Ashoonik at 4:24 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • i grew up an only, i don't think my life was difficult because of that. sure it was lonely at times when all my friends were busy but being sibling-less didn't make me miserable.

    anyway OP it sounds like you're just having a bad day. i have 3 daughters and at times i want to rip my hair out.

    Answer by tnm786 at 4:29 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • I have days like this too. My kids are 7 1/2 and 4 and can go at it like cats and dogs. Sitting listening to them fight REALLY makes me wonder WHY I had kids. It also makes me realize WHY animals in the wild eat their young. *I* think it's a very common feeling in parents, especially when their kids are acting the jerk.

    I try to take calm breaths and remember the cute and funny things they do. Or those times they crawl into your lap, say "I love you Mom" and promptly fall asleep in your arms.

    As hard as things are RIGHT NOW there is always a silver lining somewhere if you look hard enough.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 4:40 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • I have to say even with the worst of it I've never wondered why I had them, of course none of my children were planned so maybe that makes a difference. Each was a surprise and a pleasant one at that. Even the most difficult and trying of times I never questioned being a mom, I have however wondered why I bothered to get married. I think sometimes life would have been less stressful if I hadn't married their father.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 4:56 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • maybe put urself in their shoes
    try to remember what it's like to be a kid again
    some kids i watched were really messy and it pissed me the F off
    until i started getting messy with them and i thought of "get messy make mistakes" from the magic school bus
    it got me out of the mundane mind set and allowed me to live!
    i think this will def help you!! if they want to scream, let them! they are their own person, don't think others are judging you just cuz ur the mom...if it gives you a headache, leave the room! just know controlling the issue will drive you crazy, letting it all happen may, accepting it, and maybe even participating can be the answer. turn the yelling into a game, like a singing contest, or tease them by acting like a child yourself, it may make them laugh. i alway turn things around so that the kids laugh. it works every time. good luck!

    Answer by Liz4Life at 5:43 PM on Jun. 2, 2011

  • Occasionally I wondered but I had three and loved being a Mom. I would do it all over again. You just have to be calm and quiet and cool and set a good example for kids and they will learn to be calm and quiet too. Good luck. Think about the women who would love to be a Mom but they can't get pregnant.

    Answer by minnesotanice at 12:41 AM on Jun. 3, 2011

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