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2 Bumps

Why do men take wives/gfs for granted? My own husband does and plenty of other men, wtf???

It just boggles me why men do this. I feel like shit when my husband does this, and it confuses me b/c he says Im such a good wife. WTF! What do you do when your other half does this?

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:18 PM on Jun. 3, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • idk but it's one of the reasons i haven't chosen to be in a relationship since my divorce.

    Answer by mrsary at 6:33 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • girl....i feel the exact same way. i really do think its a "man" thing. i mean i know my husband loves me, but i tell him all the time it would b nice to feel appreciated though. after so many serious talks, things have finally started to get better... but i agree with you, it seems like its so damn common in relationships today. its sad

    Answer by momshell1105 at 6:36 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • I honestly don't think men take their wives any more for granted than wives do their husbands. It's just in different areas, and we tend to be blind to our own insensitivities. I can tell you that since I became more aware of my mouth and the hateful things that came out of it, my husband has been a different man. He has been much more appreciative of me since I started verbally expressing appreciation for him.

    Answer by NannyB. at 6:38 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • In my relationship I would have to admit that I am probably the one who takes him for granted more than he does me. Every single night he tell me that he loves me and appreciates me. But when I feel like he takes it for granted that I do all the cooking even though we both work, I'll quit cold turkey and tell him that he's on his own. That will stop fast!

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 6:48 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • some men do, some men don't. some women do, some women don't once you're without a lover for long enough you will realize how great it is to have one at all, but if you never had the time for that then your lover won't look any different than everyone else around you

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 6:59 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • Because we let them! You teach people how to treat you. Stop accepting the behavior and demand change. And to some extent, I agree with NannyB and lizzybee44, it's not universal, and you have to make sure you are not doing the same thing. When I want someone to be thoughtful, I try to treat them the way I want to be treated.

    Answer by dwmom2008 at 7:14 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • I think it comes with comfort. I know that I can take for granted the things my husband does for me, b/c it is just what he does.. after 15 years I know he just assumes that dinner is going to be done and the bathroom is going to be cleaned b/c that is just what I do.

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 7:14 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • bc it wasn't that long ago that we were their property. some men still have that mentality

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:25 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • pros and cons I guess. My husband tells me every once in a while how happy he is to be with me and that works for me.

    I was with a guy for about 5 years who seemed constantly afraid I was going to leave him! DH is like a refreshing break from all that!

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 8:30 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

  • No one in my nuclear family takes each other for granted. My husband and I have always thanked each other for doing stuff "Thanks for making dinner" "thanks for mowing the lawn" "thanks for going to the store". Our kids just followed suit.

    I think most men take their wives for granted because they didn't have fathers that showed them how not to.

    Stop allowing it, and start setting an example by not taking your husband or your kids for granted.

    Answer by onethentwins at 8:42 PM on Jun. 3, 2011

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