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Sometimes I feel, as a black woman, I am destined for failure. Destined for poverty and never being to get out of this. I see people I know and they are doing fun things, traveling, and stuff like that. I can not even dream of those things because I can't afford simple stuff right now. I dont have the support or anything and someone just hit me with some news that may mess me up. I am already stressed that I only have 5 diapers left until tuesday afternoon so I am trying to figure out how to make them last. The sitter says she is (now) unclear how she is getting paid and that taking me to class and stuff cost a lot of gas. She knew that I was hirining her for childcare and why now does she not get it? I sent her a contract to go over. She never said anything about it so i figured she was okay with it...if she backs out I have no one to help me and I have one more week until things are in more order...I just wish I did not have to stuggle so freaking much. No pity party but for real...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Jun. 4, 2011 in Money & Work

Answers (13)
  • It sounds like you are having one of those days. Sorry. Tomorrow you will figure it all out. Be good to yourself and sqeeze those babies tight. You will be in my thoughts.

    Answer by ochsamom at 9:51 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • That is rough, but if anyone can tough it out, it's a mom! YOu can do it! Find a local church near you, they will help! If I knew where you are, I'd sent you a box of diapers! (I am not kidding. I would be honored if you'd sent me a private email with your address). I want to help a fellow mom who is trying to make it!

    Answer by Olivia4116 at 9:52 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • I know how you feel. I am not black but I do live in a town, where there are a lot of wealthy people. I feel like I have to work three times as hard as they do, just to get half of what they have (not that I am materialistic or anything). Anyways, I do have one question. You mentioned that your sitter doesn't know how she is going to get paid. Are you paying her on time? If not, then I could understand why she feels that way. Anyways, I would check into a few local resources to see if you can get some extra diapers and maybe some help with childcare. Good Luck!


    Answer by JeremysMom at 9:54 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • it's not because your skin color that makes hard days, weeks, months or even years, it's how you apply yourself and your time to make it work for you.
    I'm white, and went through a lot of crap after my first kid. I lost my job because the car I bought (at a dealership) ended up being stolen so I had no transportation, then everything went spiraling down from there with one thing after another that ate up any savings I had. It was to the point of me not having any money, no car, I couldn't get assistance because I was living with her father and he refused to apply, and even though I split with him at that time it didn't matter to them.. so I went around to neighbors and cleaned houses for a while just to make sure my dd had food, and diapers. It sucked. Finally pulled myself out of that mess. I'm still in a lot of debt from that time in my life, but you are what you make of it.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 10:01 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • and yes, it can feel like the end of the world when things like this happen, and at times you almost feel like everything is pitted against you, but stay strong, lift that head up, be confident, and you'll get through this.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 10:02 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • and I agree with jerseymom, check out local churches ,sometimes they will help.. or if you have a free day off see if you can babysit for a day, or do some yardwork or house cleaning for a neighbor in order to get extra diapers... if you have to try to save up just enough to get a few extra clothe diapers to have as back up for situations like this. My friend got me some for burp clothes and they were great back ups for situations were I couldn't afford them when I hit my rough spot.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 10:05 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • Hey, Been there and got the teeshirt!! Go to the local salvation army. Go to one of their thrift store and ask the lady at the counter if you can get some help. Explain about the diaper situation and they willl GIVE you enough to make it through!
    I hope you feel better tomorrow, but really, GO!

    Answer by cueballsmom at 10:06 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • yeah *sighs* I am having a tough day. I dont like how she thinks I may be trying to cheat her or something. I've been hustling just like she does.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:29 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • You can youtube videos about how to make cloth diapers out of t-shirts. I use cloth diapers out of preference, but they can also help in a pinch.

    Answer by MomNtheRes at 11:20 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

  • Oh mamma I am so sorry,, I would help you if I was able, you need a hug and a friend right now,, call the sitter and beg her to keep up with her agreement, then I would call Catholic Charities in the morning to see what they could help you with,,,where are your parents, and or S/O?

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:27 PM on Jun. 4, 2011

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