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2 Bumps

Should i be the bigger person and try to repair our friendship?

i had a bff once...we became friends in 9th grade and were inseperable all throughout high school. then when we went of to college she began to change, she didnt have as much time to talk to me and was often busy with her new friends since we went to the different colleges. then when i was 19 i got preggo from my douchebag ex whom she hated. when i told her i was preggo she hung up on me and refused to even speak to me for about 6 months. this killed me, and still does 7 yrs later. our friendship was never the same after that. i felt betrayed and angry with her. my other bff was upset she told me i was stupid for getting pregnant, etc but she was there for me every step of the way....my truest friend, whom has since moved across the country. i really miss my friend who is still here, but i dont know how to let go of the distrust i feel for her. maybe i should just move on? i dont even feel like we would have the same interests anymore, we talk once every blue moom just to check ono each other but i need a bff!

 
secondtyme520

Asked by secondtyme520 at 11:06 AM on Jun. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,344 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • It's time to let go of this friendship. When she hung up and refused to speak to when you found out you were having a baby, that says A LOT about her character. Life is too short to spend it with people who bring you down.
    marine_wife0520

    Answer by marine_wife0520 at 2:45 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • If she was truly your best friend, she would not have turned her back on you. She would have been there. Remember, it's hard to be best friends when people are so very different. Friends, yes, but best friends, no. If she was a good friend, you wouldn't have to chase her down to cultivate the relationship back to what it was. It's hard to go back and make things the way they were and most of the times it never is the same. You will find other people throughout your life and before you know it you will have a best friend again that is more like you.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 11:11 AM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • Time to move on, I think.  Especially when you say " i dont even feel like we would have the same interests anymore, we talk once every blue moon".  People change over time and it was a long time ago that you were so close.  GL

    whitepeppers

    Answer by whitepeppers at 11:09 AM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • That friend of yours showed you she was not be relied on as a friend, so when and if you do go back to being friends keep this in mind. People change as we grow specially in the age of finding your place, and I guess she found hers and didn't want to include you in it, for her own reasons. I would keep the talk once in a blue moon kind of thing.
    older

    Answer by older at 11:11 AM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • You should forgive her. Forgiveness is not for her, it's for you. When you hold on to unforgiveness, it eats away at you and holds you back...in the meantime, she probably (unfortunately) hasn't thought twice about it. Don't live your life like that. I had a bff once that did me dirty and I had to let her know how I felt. It sucked losing her but you can't hang on to stuff like that. Just be open and honest about your feelings with her. Let her know how you feel. If she accepts and apologizes great! But if not, at least you will know that you have let it out. And remember - "but if you refuse to forgive others , your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:15. I hope this helps :)
    Suzieque31

    Answer by Suzieque31 at 11:12 AM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • i had alomst the same thing happen, i mistakingly stayied frinds till a bit ago, i feel free and happy wo her. let go of her, rememeber the good times and move on. it may be hard, but i earesed her number and on fb and even blocked her on fb. it was just better that way.
    Susannah19

    Answer by Susannah19 at 1:11 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • Honestly, if she didn't support you even though you all knew it was a bad situation then she's not that great a friend to start with. Friends will stand by you even when you make stupid choices, especially when, even.
    jandshyne

    Answer by jandshyne at 1:12 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • I think it is time to find a new BFF, maybe someone with common interests closer to your home?
    stacy8606

    Answer by stacy8606 at 1:31 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • find a new bff
    but it doesn't mean you have to let her go. i would just stop thinking about it and instead meet new people or strengthen the relationships you already have. time heals and you never know....you two may have a rekindled friendship without even having to try to "make it work"
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 1:44 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

  • so no i wouldn't try to repair it because only time can do that
    be the bigger person in other ways like letting it go and being active
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 1:45 PM on Jun. 5, 2011

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