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2 Bumps

Why does my 'friend' keep doing this...ugh

so my 'friend' of many years is getting on my nerves.
She keeps inferencing that I only talk to her out of 'convenience' and that real friends make time for their friends and all this crap IMO

umm I made time for this girl so many occasions, what did she do? FLAKE so no I am not going to make time, if it isnt convenient it isn't convenient.

Now she has her mom putting stuff on FB about how friends are forever and not to take eachother for granted. I'm sorry, but this girl is always doing this, only difference between the last times and this time, is I actually gave a shit. Now I could care less. I have realized that friends understand when other friends are busy, and have a lot of stress and things to do within time limits. wtf makes her so entitled to think I should drop off my priorities for her...lol not going to happen.

how do i even deal with this?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:19 AM on Jun. 6, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • some people think everything should be all about them and that the whole world revolves around them the best thing u can do is eliminate people like that out of ur life its so much healthier for u and ur family cuz think about it like this if she was a true friend she would understand that life is busy and hectic sometimes and sometimes u go days without talking 2 anybody but ur immediate family thats just life good luck honey maybe u will find urself a true understanding good friend one thats not so needy and rude!!
    CandelariaMama

    Answer by CandelariaMama at 10:32 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • I used to have a "friend" that was really needy like that too, but she was an emotional vampire...she was so negative that after hanging out with her I would just be exhausted...finally I decided I just needed to "break up" with her...things got really weird in a way that I won't go into after that..but although mine might not be the diplomatic answer I would say just cut her off...I would tell you to tell her the reasons why..but like I said, I tried to do that with my "friend" and things got super weird in a stalkerish way after that so...if you think that might be whats going to happen, hey, just cut her off...stop all communication and eventually she'll get the hint...good luck mama
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 1:33 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • do you own thing
    letstalk747

    Answer by letstalk747 at 1:21 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • Facebook is just a place for people to get into trouble
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • i always do my own thing...apparently thats part of the issue
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:23 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • this was not born on fb.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:24 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • what does she mean when she says your are only making time 'out of convenience' does she feel that you only make plans with her when there's nothing better to do?

    I have a SIL that used to do that. This is a woman who was known to book and plan vacations a year in advance and would wait until the last minute before setting up plans with us. Such as we'd ask to set a date to do a certain activity, and she'd tell us she wouldn't know 'that far ahead' or she'd maybe set a date, but tell us that we'd only get together if 'nothing else came up' She canceled a few times and based on what BIL (her husband ) told me, the dates were canceled because someone else called about doing another activity.
    Looked like she was only OK with seeing us as long as nothing more interesting came up.
    If you're doing this to your friend then I think she has a point.
    cont-
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 9:10 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • cont- if it's a case of needing to do schoolwork or things your kids need to get to like sports and you explain that to her, that's one thing. If she doesn't understand that, then she's the one with the problem.
    what do you mean that she flakes? Does she make plans with you then forget about it?
    I have a friend like that. She is pretty self centered and often doesn't understand why things don't revolve around her since so often other people act that way. If I can't do things the way she likes I tell her so and why. If she gets upset I just let her feel the way she feels.
    In her case she would forget things a lot. So I started calling her the day before the activity just to 'check in' about it, then before I'd leave the house, I'd call her to tell her I was leaving to remind her.
    Maybe you and your friend just don't understand each other due to different situations.
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 9:17 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • and by the way her mom is getting involved i would tell her too tell her mom 2 get a life and some friends off her own and quit being a meddling pain in the rear and get a life other than facebook the nerve of some people
    CandelariaMama

    Answer by CandelariaMama at 10:35 AM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • Tell yOur friend she is right. Tell her you feel like you are growing in different directions and so not being the kind of friend she needs. Tell her it makes you sad, but that you want to give this friendship a break for awhile. Maybe in a year or two things will be different, but that you don't have what it takes to be her friend right now. That should shut her up and maybe her mother too. If not, just drop them both permanently.
    Ms.Gwen

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 11:36 AM on Jun. 6, 2011