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Preteen girls

So, I have twin daughters who are almost 12. One of them is very conservative, the other, well, likes attention. How can I be there to make sure that she doesn't attract the wrong attention? I do homeschool them too. Has anyone dealt with this at such an early age? Society today is filled with sexually explicit things it seems like. What can I do to keep them safe.....very worried :(

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Jun. 6, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (7)
  • Perhaps get her into an activity where she feels she can shine, but do so positively. Maybe a sport, or scouts, or in a leadership position where she's able to help others.
    Camey82

    Answer by Camey82 at 6:26 PM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • I worry about this, too. I''m sure most parents do. And IMO worrying about it is the 1st step...it's good that you think about it rather than ignoring it. I only have one daughter, my only child, and she is only 10 months old so obviously I won't be dealing with this for years to come. But I think that we have to lead by example and also teach them to respect themselves. Give them so much love that they don't desire to seek it out in the wrong places. Always give them a loving and caring home to feel safe in. I would like to homeschool, too, but I also think that sheltering isn't the answer either. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone falters. It's our job to be there to talk about it, explain things, encourage, and get them back on their feet. Always let her know how beautiful she is in every way and that she is worthy of all the best things in life! Good Luck!!
    Ludvik_Smith

    Answer by Ludvik_Smith at 6:28 PM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • Y do u homeschool? How do they make friends if they don't go to school?
    dancer

    Answer by dancer at 6:39 PM on Jun. 6, 2011

  • How about musical theatre. Being on stage might be enough attention for her.
    jcm62497

    Answer by jcm62497 at 7:40 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Have you sat her down and educated her about the risks of some of the behaviors you're concerned about. I also agree with past posters who think she should get involved in an activity. Also when she wants to be social and be around friends maybe you could suggest they hang out at your place so you can keep an eye on them.
    tspillane

    Answer by tspillane at 10:19 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • In general, WE CAN't be there 100% of the time to make sure they are giving off the right impression and making the right decisions. It's SCARY, you are so right. I truly believe if we stay on track with our daily, general routine and boundaries with the kids, THAT is the best we can give them Mayb try diverting her without her realizing it. There's always a way to do that or have a social story pop up out of no where lol. They are great even you have a teen, we have our ways of working in that social story.
    DallasFan08

    Answer by DallasFan08 at 8:20 AM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • Yes. I think most of us mom's of preteen girls do worry about this. My dd is 11 and she is all about getting attention. She is pretty and likes make up and such. My dh and I have sheltered her quite a bit and we don't plan on stopping. She goes to a private school and my sil has told me that compared to my nieces 6 and 7 year old friends she is very innocent. That is what my dh and I want~our kid to be a kid. It's rough w/so much crap out there to protect them just enough to allow them to be their age.
    momthruivf

    Answer by momthruivf at 4:12 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

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