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I need some advice on how to get my 8 and 7 yr old to listen to me. They want to argue and back talk me with just about everything I ask them to do. It doesn't help that my ex husband has said that they can come live with him. Any suggestions are appreciated as it can be awful some days.

I am tired of arguing with my kids over sometimes such simple matters as just putting their clothes away. Anybody been in the same position? My kids think they do not have to listen, and though they are small, their remarks can sting. Please help.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:18 PM on Dec. 10, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (3)
  • Consistancy is what works. You tell them they cannot decide where they will live until they are atleast 12 by law. That in order for them to live with their dad their dad would have to petition the court for that and since you are going to fight for them because you love them they have to just suck it up and realize you have rules that have to be obeyed. If they arent, then they are grounded or have things taken from them (or whatever you use to punish them).
    Let them know what happens at their dads under his rules are just that. If he lets them juggle knives you cant stop that while on HIS time but on YOUR time you will be respected, they will do their chores, or they will be grounded.

    Answer by gemgem at 1:24 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • It sounds to me like your ex has put an idea into their heads. If you and your ex don't get along, maybe it's time to talk to him and tell him what the kids are doing and how they are treating you. It might be time for him to grow up and realized the his feelings toward you have nothing to do with the children. Also, maybe you need to talk to your kids, tell them how it makes you feel when they disrespect you or treat you badly. A word we use in our house is empathy, if one of our kids is out of line with a comment or an attitude, we ask them, "how would it make you feel if someone was to treat you that way" it usually makes them second guess their actions and now they do it themselves if they catch themselves getting out of line. My kids are 9 and6. Good luck.

    Answer by happyathomemum at 1:27 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • Hope this helps. You are not alone . I have been having the same issues this week .My kids are 9 yrs and 14 and they have been so diffiant,. I need a friend .It has been so hard . My son started saying his Dad said he can live with him. I would be soo sad. If you need to vent i am here.

    Answer by faithoflove at 6:15 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

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