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2 Bumps

Depression and just got married

I just got married to a wonderful man. I am 36. I suffer from depression and I am bipolar. I've been in therapy for 12 years and I am on medication. Today I was so depressed I just layed down and cried while my husband held me. He is so good and I feel like crap about it. I've been married 5 days and I've already told him I should move out. I mean, besides therapy, medication, the classes I take on self esteem and other issues, and prayer, I just don't know what to do!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:14 AM on Jun. 7, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I have the same thing and have days like this please go to my journals and read them. I am here for you if you need to talk; you can add me as a friend and then you can access my profile also. I understand fully and also have been on medicine and through therapy have had bipolar and depression for 12 years. It is not fun and there are days that all I want to do is cry and my therapist told me to just go ahead and cry that it does help. Here are some links to my journals. Feel free to add me so we can talk.

    http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1657526/Depression

    http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1660687/Depression

    http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1661387/Understanding_Bipolar
    Christmaslver68

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 6:46 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • This is my opinion, i am no doctor. Bipolar needs to be attended to, so very glad to hear you are on meds and go to therapy. Maybe its time to switch meds? Being married for five days and already talking about splitting? or moving out? plz!! You gotta put work and effort into your marriage if you want it to last.

    dmr73059

    Answer by dmr73059 at 2:30 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Bless your heart. The first few months/years of marriage can be rough for anyone...especially if you're having a hard time emotionally to start with. Do you have a pastor/minister you can talk with? Find someone to spend some time with you. A good doctor will take the time to listen and find out what is causing this.
    Sometimes it can be something simple like changes in diet. Finding the right medicine for you is also key. It can make you or break you. Take it to the Lord in prayer, as I know you are. Hope you can find some help soon. We are here for you.
    Ruthmom802

    Answer by Ruthmom802 at 2:27 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Sounds like you need to sign up for some depression research studies and see if theres more that can be done for you
    campbellb3421

    Answer by campbellb3421 at 2:25 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • I forgot to mention but I actually did two of them through my doctors. Don't get me wrong, I have good days but the bad days are pretty bad.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:27 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • I'm bipolar & I found that talking and or writing about how I'm feeling (especially those "crappy cry days") helps a lot. I would try to see about switching meds or getting a different dose of the one(s) you have. Also, marriage doesn't magically work, you have to work at it,
    Tink0711

    Answer by Tink0711 at 2:38 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • I have not been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but I do suffer from depression. I know exactly how you feel. If you feel your meds are not working for you, there ARE other options, you just have to be willing to do the trial and error thing with them. It took me several weeks and 4 different meds before we found one that would work for me. Also, I like the idea about writing when you're feeling bad, but you could also write when you're feeling ok- might help you find some of your 'triggers'. I hope you start to feel better soon, Momma. Good luck!
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 8:20 AM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Depression is a tricky and difficult illness to treat & understand. It varies so drastically from one individual to the next and treatment is never the same for any one either. I too have suffered for many years from treatment resistent depression on and off throughout both wonderful and difficult periods throughout my life. During times where my support system has been at it's best I have had some of my darkest days and at some of my lonliest times I have been the most stable. It is all a fine balance between, hormones, biology, and environment at any given day, hour, or even minute sometimes. Just try to remember during the worst of times that a brighter light will always shine again. You won't always feels as bad as you do at that given moment no matter how bad it feels at the time (and I know how dire it can feel). At least it sounds like you have a new husband who wants to learn. Hugs to you!
    kdwiegandt

    Answer by kdwiegandt at 6:23 AM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • One thing that is a huge help to me is to have a goal. Something to look forward to. You just did all this planning for your wedding, and now it's over, and you've got the blues. Just like the post- holiday blahs we all get. Get out the calendar! What's coming up that you are excited about? Vacation? Hubby's company picnic? A friends wedding? A new class? A visit from an old friend? A home improvement project? Focus on those short term milestones so you have a REASON to get out out of bed in the morning. There are days when just folding the laundry feels like I accomplished something, and I can be proud of that. One day at a time, dear. One day at a time.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:48 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • i'm sorry you have been seeing a therapist for 12 years and meds and you are still depressed. you have a wonderful man obviously so why the depression? do you work, do things outside of the home? hang out with friends, family. hit the gym to relieve stress. take a walk with your husband. good luck to you.
    lucky35

    Answer by lucky35 at 2:30 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

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