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What would you do?

Let me start by explaining, My SIL and her 2yr daughter live with us. My MIL lives in the garage appt. behind our house. My DH asks me to keep the piece and try not to fight with them, yet he doesn't want to be the "middle man".

Now.... My SIL and MIL do not talk to me at all, my SIL is never here (like I tell my DH "she uses us as a hotel/grocery store") she sleeps here and takes food (but doesn't eat here). Her "routine" is this, wake up, take Ayla (her daughter) and herself to my MILs house, come back at nap time put Ayla down for a nap (doesn't even wait to be sure she goes to sleep) and go back to MILs house, come back in a few hours later to get Ayla and goes back to MILs house, comes back at bed time puts Ayla in bed (agai, doesn't wait for her to go to sleep) and goes back to MILs house until shes ready to go to bed herself... She expects me to watch her daughter and that in its self drives me crazy!

She sent me a text yesterday telling me " Jus lettin u knw on tues and thrs i have class till 505 i wont be home till 6 or so cuz i got to walk". That's it, that's all it said, and by that she was telling me to watch her daughter! I just love the way my SIL and MIL hink i have no life and am some kind of live in babysitter...!

We have a 2 bedroom house and 5 kids all together, we have to make due with the boys sharing 1 room and SIL with her daughter in the other room, we turned our living room into our bedroom (which we share with the baby) and our dining room is now our living room, needless to say we could really use the room my SIL is in... And there is so much more to say, but that is the basics of it...

What I want to do is just take them off our food stamps and put my SILs things outside with a note telling her to get her own food stamps and her own house because I'm tired of dealing with it all... The problem being that it will cause a fight between me and my DH. What would you do?

Answer Question
 
lilliedoll

Asked by lilliedoll at 12:44 PM on Jun. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 11 (558 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • Sounds like y'all have wayyy too many kids ... you can't even support your own let alone support SILs.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • You've got to talk to your DH. This is ridiculous. Is he home to see all of this? Does he watch his neice when he's home or is that all up to you?
    jteffs

    Answer by jteffs at 12:47 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Can't sil and mil live in the same little apt behind your house no matter how tiny it is? That's my first suggestion. Then mil and sil can go get their food stamps together. You would have your house back for you and your family. Then tell sil you are not her live in babysitter and she must ask you in advance about taking care of her daughter OR mil can do it.

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 12:47 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Talk to your DH and let him know it is affecting your family how you can all be more comfortable including your children. I am sure you would both like more privacy as well.
    roxy0522

    Answer by roxy0522 at 12:48 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • That's ridiculous! I would have a talk with your husband.. He should understand.

    & first anon--that was pretty rude! Sounds like she's doin the best she can!
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 12:50 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • i would talk to him and tell him they need to be out of here by a certain date. Just explain that it is going to be putting your relationship in jeopardy and that is not fair. They sound like a bunch of free loaders. I hope your situation improves soon
    newlife627

    Answer by newlife627 at 12:51 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • jteffs: He is completely oblivious to all of it, he never even knows when his niece is here.

    Anonymous: I know we have too many kids. But that's not the point.
    lilliedoll

    Comment by lilliedoll (original poster) at 12:52 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • She needs to go, move her in with the MIL. Tell DH to man up and take care of HIS family! Sorry, don't mean to be rude, but come on!
    Dahis

    Answer by Dahis at 12:52 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • I agree with and have talk to him about all of that... he just keeps says that she'll be out in a couple months, and has been says that since dec.
    lilliedoll

    Comment by lilliedoll (original poster) at 12:55 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Tell her to go live with her mother since shes there all the time anyway. Thats unacceptable. I mean, My husband and I live with our parents because its pretty difficult right now, but my husband has a job, and he pays rent and we buy food, but everyone shares here. They would never let us treat them like that, and I wouldn't ever treat my in laws like that either. I'd kick her out honestly. Thats disrespectful.
    monstersmommy20

    Answer by monstersmommy20 at 12:59 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

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