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Moved to DH's home state and hate it starting to resent him.

We sold our house in the state I lived in my whole life, we knew that we needed to sell and buy something cheaper. So we tossed around the idea of moving to my DH's homestate 800 miles away. We moved and not without a lot of tears, depression and agony. We bought a house here.....I hate it here. And to top it off my daughter is moving back to live with her father. We currently have this house for sale, but the market sucks. What is making me so angry and resentful is that we could've sold and bought in the town we were in and my children and I would be happy and I wouldn't have to let my daughter go. Now we are stuck here hating life.

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Asked by irockmom3 at 3:31 PM on Dec. 10, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • Did you make the decision to move there together? If so, you are just as much to blame. But what's the point in being mad? Why not make the best of it until you can make a change?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • Things don't always work out the way we want them to. Resenting DH for a decision you made together will drive a wedge between you. In times of crisis you should be standing together and not blaming each other. It's you and him against the world!!!

    Answer by companygoddess at 3:42 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • You both are so right and I do love him and trust him and feel that it is us against the world. It is very hard for me not to blame him.....he has a very strong personality and I don't. I don't want to blame him. I just really want to get home!

    Answer by irockmom3 at 3:46 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • Then move back home, and wait leave keys with realtor and come back for signing. Rent if you have to, stay with family if you have to.... but being away from your daughter is likely what's got you so upset right now.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 3:54 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • you were part of the decision, weren't you? well, why not admit it was a mistake and talk to your hubby and come to a different decision together... you tried it, you don't like it. you're just not happy with circumstances, don't let it seep into your relationship - that's not the problem. it is hard to adjust to a new place. i've been in texas nearly 7 years and still trying to not hate it. what i appreciate about it (my hubby, my daughter, things i've learned) is all portable. i try to focus on those things.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 4:20 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • I'm kind of in the same situation, but we only moved about 300 miles. I hate it here. I hate our house, I hate the town we live in. Dh loves it because he grew up here, has tons of friends and family. Now we're stuck because we bought this house and now we can't sell it. I used to complain to him A LOT about it and we would get into fights. Finally he said 'I know you hate it here, but there's nothing we can do about it right now, so what good is complaining about it going to do?' For some reason I never thought of it that way. I try to keep reminding myself of that, and now I'm just hoping the housing market turns around and then we can get rid of this house and figure out something else that will make us both happy. Probably doesn't help you too much, I guess I just wanted to say you're definately not alone in how you feel!

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 4:28 PM on Dec. 10, 2008

  • Well I'll assume you made the dicision to move to his home state together. You did agree to go. So you should try not to blame it on him. Accept the fact that you both decided to move there, and your in this together. Now you go from here....together, as a team.

    Answer by robinann5 at 2:14 AM on Dec. 11, 2008

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