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I don't know what to think

My DH and I were arguing and it got ugly. I am overweight, and he was trying to put some type of green in my noodles. I hate soup to begin with, and noodles were the only thing around. I HATE veggies in my noodles. I will eat them on the side raw, but not in it. He kept arguing with me. Then he told me he hopes I hurry up and die so it will just get over then. Why prolong it. He told me to go out and get some fast food so help speed it up.

I thought this was completely uncalled for. I got so mad I threw it down the sink. Then I got yelled at for that. He said I shouldn't eat at all because I am not grateful for it. Yet he forgets he throughout a whole meal one day for 4 people because he was throwing a fit. I don't he really cares about me, if he did, he wouldn't have told me to hurry up and die.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Jun. 7, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • you want to leave, but do not know how... then this first question and comment on what he said THIS time does not matter
    call a women's abuse center, and talk to a professional, these people have heard it all and helped numberous amount of women just like you get up on their feet and walk away from abuse

    you can do it too
    do not give yourself excuses not to move on and be happy
    if he is an abuser he will not get better (maybe for a day-then back to more abuse)
    you already know this

    just do it!

    call a womens abuse center and talk to someone - they are there to help you!
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 10:18 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • What a jackass. If my husband ever said that shit to me, I would punch him in his big gut!
    emmyandlisa

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:32 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Sounds like there are several issues that need to be talked about and worked through. I'd list them and start the conversation soon. Come to some agreement on what will be acceptable and respectful, because there is definitely a lack of both in this relationship. Good Luck

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 8:34 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Wow, I cant imagine my husband saying anything like that, I can imagine that would be very hurtful, and I know people often say things in anger they dont mean but I do really think thats uncalled for. Only thing I can think is maybe thats something that is heavily on his mind alot and it just all came gushing out but under the wrong emotion- anger. Maybe he feels like he is watching you slowly die, maybe this is painful for him, he doesnt want to imagine being without you, and he may feels like you dont want to help yourself and just dont want to do anything about it, so he is trying to help by giving you some vegetables etc and it all just escalated from there.....I think you both really need to sit down and talk about it, explain the hurt but also listen to what he is thinking.....Good luck with this and ((hugs))
    Princess_s21

    Answer by Princess_s21 at 8:36 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Sounds like you are in an abusive relationship and you need to leave before your self-esteem is so far in the toilet that you can't get back out of it. He's the jerk. Eat what you want, you are a grown-up and can make your own decisions.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 8:36 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Sometimes in arguments we say things we often don;t mean or that we know will be hurtful..If he didnt;t care about you he wouldnt;t argue with you over eating veggies. He would just let you eat whatever you wanted and if it's the fact your overweight and he doesn't like it personally he would have made a jab that way it sounds like he cares about you and said some hurtful things...when everything has calmed down let him know how much he hurt you.

    happymama02

    Answer by happymama02 at 8:44 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • It sounds like he is being childish by throwing fits. He could actually just care about your health and want you to get healthy or he is just an a**. Either way he could have gone about it a different way. Telling you to hurry up die was definitely uncalled for.
    SMG1120

    Answer by SMG1120 at 8:34 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • *hugs* momma. . . i am so sorry to hear that! sweetie no one deserves to be treated like that and everyone, every life is sacred. You are beautiful just the way you are. He is a jerk!
    Kirs

    Answer by Kirs at 8:43 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • i think he feels you are killing yourself and that is why he said it.. he's trying to help you stay healthy yet you are rejecting the help. he probably got frustrated at that point because to him you are basically committing suicide and all he can do is stand by and watch and it hurts him.,
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 9:31 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • Its not that I don't eat veggies or do physical activities. He wants me to eat my food the way he eats his. I personally hate cooked veggies. I have always eaten them raw and with no dressing, which is suppose to be healthier. We have been having a bad time lately, and he is using any excuse he can to yell. He has never told me to hurry up and die. That just threw me for a loop today. Now I definitely feel unwanted and unloved. I can't even muster the words "I love you" to him anymore. My mom tells me to get out, because I don't deserve it, but when you have children it is difficult to drop everything. Not to mention I just lost a baby a few months ago. I don't think he is taking things into consideration. I don't know how to leave, but I want to.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:37 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

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