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I'm 34 weeks pregnant. My husband is always telling me to take it easy and rest and to ask him for help. Thats hard for me to do because he has been working a lot of over time and he is always sore and exhausted. But today I asked him if he would do dishes and there wasnt a lot to do but I was feeling really hot, sore and exhausted. When I asked he made it seem like it was a big deal and he got grumpy and that made me feel guilty and worse for asking. Maybe it was just the heat and he was feeling over heated like I was and thats why I got that reaction from him. How should I go about explaining to him that he made me feel that way without starting a fight and that his reaction is part of the reason why I dont ask for help?

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SMG1120

Asked by SMG1120 at 8:40 PM on Jun. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,880 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • Wait until the dust settles and talk about it then. It's always better to come from a calm place on both parts when talking over a disagreement. Just be honest and tell him how we made you feel. --It's confusing and frusturating for him to suggest his help and then make you feel bad for asking. It's not fair.

    Lay it out for him, but do it from a calm place. It's been my experience with my husband, that if I come at him--both barrels--with a gripe, we're right back at sqaure one--fighting. Hope you can get things sorted out! :)
    CaseyErin

    Answer by CaseyErin at 8:51 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • First of all, he also might have been feeling the same way as you and after working all day and having to help, that just pushed him over the limit. Far too many women these days can't push themselves enough to do what needs to be done. I had 3 little ones at home and was able to do everything myself. And I'm no super mom by any means. It was just my job, the same as the husband's job is at where he works. With that being said, if he told you to ask and you did, then he shouldn't have responded that way. I have one like that, he wants to know what he can do to help out and then it's like pulling teeth giving a couple little chores. He does work OTR, but I now take care of EVERYTHING here, including the farm, girl jobs, boy jobs and everything.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 9:02 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

  • how did you ask him? maybe that might be why too,
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 9:21 PM on Jun. 7, 2011

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