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Would you or wouldnt you?

Let me preface with I really am not a total bitch. My ex husband didnt pay child support for a number of years and has a felony flagrant non support on his record. Now he has a job, he is remarried, has a new family and pretends our kids dont exist. I think if he didnt pay child support he might be able to convince himself of it completely. The only times he does pay them any attention is to get photos of the grandkids (who hes only met at biirth mind you) to put on his desk to show people.
So my dd is 22 and I have never asked her to do "detective" work for me. She just gets upset and everything with her dad, and who can blame her I guess? He is on her FB and he announced he got a substantial raise. She told me I need to take him back to child support court and get a raise. The thing is our youngest turns 18 in July. I will continue to get support until he is 19, possibly 21. We are in the process of the length he will pay right now. Do you think I should ask for a raise or just leave it? I dont know what to do. I honestly can give a crap about him.
Yes I can use the money because our son is going to college so that money can be used there, but I can also do it on my own with just my current husband and my help. My current husband has raised son I get child support for since he was 7. My son doesnt even count his biodad as dad.


Asked by gemgem at 11:51 AM on Jun. 8, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 42 (148,630 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • if he is caught up === and bragging about his raise.. and your children (or dd) feel slighted by him - be the champion for them - because your ex and his feelings do not matter.... and get some more money for him (assuming that the court cost wont overdraft the raise in CS.) why not.

    Answer by AmaliaD at 1:32 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • I would definitely take him back to court to get more money!! Even if you don't need it.. you sure as heck didn't lay down and have those kids yourself!..and he needs to help take care of them!

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 12:06 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • Honestly, if you don't need it, it probably isn't worth the effort. That being said, he IS still responsible for half of your son's college tuition, books, etc. Talk to your son about it because it is liable to cause dad to decide to step into the picture, if for nothing else than to complain that you are taking him back to court.

    Answer by attap5 at 11:54 AM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • He is still in the picture at his conveniance. He calls every so often but never visits. He says driving the 5 hours to visit would cost him $1000.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 12:01 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • I might just because he called and said hes coming to graduation and I am like wth lol. As if he had anything to do with getting him there.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 12:08 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • What about the back child support? Is he caught up or still behind? I would take him to court, and be happy to do it!

    Answer by kimigogo at 12:11 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • He is caught up now. We split up in 98. He didnt start paying until 2004. My dd was 14 when I got our first payment and shes 22 now and when she was 17 he started the paperwork to have her removed. Its how he is.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 12:14 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • I don't think any parent is "responsible" for their child's college. Most people pay for their children because they want to, it's not a legal responsibility.

    If It were me, at this time of their life I'd leave it.

    Answer by onethentwins at 2:16 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

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