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I don't know what to do, now I have to live with a man who calls me stupid !

My fiance is away in DC with the air force for a few weeks... meanwhile I am sitting at home pregnant. I got upset because I couldnt talk to him very long and when he finally called me back I told him that I was upset ( which is my right to do that ) ... I told him that I think he is just with me because of the baby , and he told me to stop being stupid and that I need to stop talking like that... I told him it was just because of the pregnancy hormones and he said it isnt because I acted like that before i got pregnant , so I said well why did you get me pregnant then, and all he said was that he had to go and hung up...

I am so upset I cant believe this is the life I have to live, I have made a huge mistake ! i just cant live my life with someone who is going to call me stupid when I am just upset, and pregnant at that !

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:52 PM on Jun. 8, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • it sounds like you both have some growing-up to do.

    Answer by dullscissors at 2:53 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • Get rid of him before you take it a step further, marriage.

    Answer by RelaxedMom2-3 at 2:54 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • sounds like you were both flustered with the moment at sure things were said that either of you didnt mean..just try and cool down and talk things out when you speak with him again..also pregnancy hormones will make both of you dh works out of state and was gone while i was preggo and it was about how you felt about what all he said and hopefully you can come to terms and make up...good luck

    Answer by jorjiegirl at 2:55 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • You seem like your really emotional right now. It doesnt sound like he was directly calling you "stupid". Your hormones are out of whack,hun...your feeling really sensitive and maybe a little insecure and unsure and probably a little lonely with him being gone. He probably didnt want to deal with being yelled at and just hung up...which..if he was a smart & wise man...he would know better than to ever hang up on a pregnant woman! LOL.
    Just try to relax...go take a nice bath.Think of all the things you love about him.Think about the baby your going to have together. And when he calls you again ( and he will call again) just say lets start over again, I don't want to fight with you. I love you and I know you love me too.Tell him you miss him and then let him talk about himself some.
    You guys will get through this.Just try to relax! Congrats on baby, mama :)

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 2:59 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • honestly you both need to grow up. . . I know being pregnant and your SO or DH being away with Military. . . it is hard and emotions run high. But not just for you. Things suck in life. And Pregnancy hormones aside, if he felt you were like this before and still is with you. . . it is because he wants to be with you. Cry a little get it all out and get over it. JMHO. GL

    Answer by Kirs at 3:00 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • Grow up! Using your pregnancy as an excuse is wrong. He's there on business and it sounds like you're very insecure. If you cared about him you'd start finding something to do while he's gone and show him that you're an adult.

    Answer by baconbits at 3:00 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • You need to talk to him face to face... It was rude of him to hang up on you.. The hormones are to balm a little but no women should be alone during pregnancy! Or go through that kind of stress! Gosh I wish my husband went through a pregnancy himself.. Maybe that way he'll realize! But.. You have to think about this carefully, there's a baby on the way and you must decide what you want for you and your baby.. Do you want to leave him? Are you willing to try fix your relationship? Maybe he's under some sort of stress.. You don't know what he's dealing with, Confront him...

    Answer by Vian.aram at 3:01 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • yeah and now I keep trying to call him back and he turned his phone off !!!!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:11 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • My thoughts based on what was shared here.

    There seems to be anger and resentment on your part. One would not make a statement like "why did you get me pregnant" if they are happy, comfortable and secure in their situation. Was this by chance an unplanned pregnancy? If it was, it sounds like he may not be the one or only one coming to terms with the situation as it is.

    Bottom line. You do not have to live your life with this person. It's a choice, you either choose to do so or not. IF you feel you can not live your life with this person then don't. If you feel like he is only with you because you are pregnant. May I ask.. Why are you with him if you feel this strongly about him not being the right person for you? Really think about it, why are you with this person if you feel you have made a mistake? Could it be that maybe you are transferring some of your own feelings onto him?

    Communication seems lacking on both parts

    Answer by pixie_trix at 3:16 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

  • He said you were BEING stupid (behavior) not that you WERE stupid. Don't over react. Calm down and let it go. My SO is air force too and they hate that drama. So if you want to keep him, cut it out

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Jun. 8, 2011

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