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Dinner with friends........

I am Really Irritated. I made plans with 2 of my girlfriends to go out and have a dinner. I asked him if he could watch her so I could go out to dinner. This morning I asked him what time he would be home. He got all annoyed.. and the way he said it was " why cause you wanna go out!!?!?!? Is that why you are saying that?" I am a Stay at home mom for a 1 year old. I never see my friends... It bothers me sooooo much that he can't see days where I am tearing my hair out for me time. He acts like watching her is such a huge task. My husband will go to work , come home and I will have the baby bathed and Pjs on and bubbas ready for him. I may be out 2 hours tops. I just feel so sad after he responds in that way and it makes me not want to go out anymore because it plays upon the guilt I already feel while away from my daughter. How can I let him know it upsets me? I feel like he just doesn't get it! When I have gotten upset over it after he responded in a certain way after me asking about it to remind him... He acted like he didn't have a problem with it which I could tell by how he said it he was aggravated. I just feel like he is being so selfish. He got to go away with his brother and father this past weekend to a concert 3 hours away and I was with the baby for 3 days alone at my mother in laws. He didn't really give two shits to check in see how I was doing with the baby... I don't need him to do that but why should I feel bad over 2 hours?

Your Thoughts...

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Asked by staciepi at 8:56 AM on Jun. 9, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 15 (2,019 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • just remind him about all the times he gets to go out. i would get mad and say - well watch what you say or i will go off to concerts for 3 days LIKE YOU....

    Answer by AmaliaD at 9:15 AM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • This is what we women have to deal with when society is saying that SAHM are lazy and we don't do anything because we don't have a career. So much emphasis is put on working outside the home that no one feels that we need a break. Men do not realize all we do in a day and the house doesn't magically clean itself, that it might be clean when they leave and come home, but it's only because there was work going on when they were gone. Men have generally felt that way forever, but now it's really being drilled into them. Moms jobs are 24/7 with no vacation, no sick days, work twice as hard on holidays and there's no punching a clock. It doesn't start at 9 and end at 5. SAHM just need to start sticking up for themselves and let the world know how hard we work.

    Answer by attap5 at 9:33 AM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • What you need to explain to him is, you didn't have this baby by yourself. I would also put the guilt on him. Saying you never ask anything of him (I assume, if you're like me, you don't) and that you are depending on him to be there for you. That your friends are depending on you. I would also remind him of those three days. My dh doesn't do much with the children, and he has scheduled over time when I had asked him to watch the boys for a GNO (girls night), but he tries more now than he used to. I think he just needs to develop a little more respect for what you do! Don't skip your night out!! You go, let him see for a couple of hours "what you do all day" lol.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 11:42 AM on Jun. 9, 2011

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