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Do you think your kids respect you more because you are a SAHM?

someone posted this on another question. i thought it was horrible to say that about working mothers. so children do not respect working mothers that is just rude and ignorant. i think anyone who thnks that get off your high horse and get out into the real world. alot of children do not think their moms work at all while being home. so you might think you have a job but your children might think differently. i hear first hand. my nephews said that one time about my sil. so you might see one thing but they might see another. i am not saying all children think this way but this woman thought thise and its just was so low i had to get it out there and see what everyone else thinks.

i am not bashing sahm i am just saying one person on cafemom said that and this is why it continues to be a battle because of the ignorance. well i take that back. the person that says ignorant things that give you as sahm a bad name.
i respect all moms its a hard job. no matter what. sahm are no better and neither are working moms. we are doing the best we can.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:29 PM on Jun. 9, 2011 in Parenting Debate

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • It isn't about working or not working. It is about how a child is loved, respected, and nurtured. A parent can be home all day and not really be there mentally or emotionally for her children. You can go to every baseball game, soccer match, and dance recital. You can pack lunches, iron shirts, and cooks three meals a still would not guarantee you your children will see you as there for them and respected their own ideas and needs. And it doesn't mean because you are a working mother you being selfish or hurting your children. There are parents who are just not up to par per their chdren regardless of employment status.

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:23 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • My kids respected me when I was working and respected me while I'm a SAHM I won't have any less. If they can't respect me then I'm not doing my job as a mother teaching them how to respect other ppl

    Answer by myownhappiness at 10:35 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • My kids would respect me no matter what I did, that is how they are being raised.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 10:42 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • I never considered a mother's employment status to determine respect from her children. Every child should be raised to respect their parents regardless of whether or not they work or stay home. As children grow their respect should then be determined by what kind of parent you are. I've met working moms and stay at home moms who are dedicated to their children, of course they have a break here and there but their children come first and because of that their children respect them. I've also met SAHM who completely ignore their children, my cousin is one of them - she lived with our grandmother when her DD was little and it was our grandmother who took care of both of them. When my cousin got married and had another child she only acted like a mom when her husband was home, while he was at work she left most of the responsibility to her then 8 year old DD and she isn't the only mom I know who is like that.

    Answer by anon1986East at 10:47 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • My son often gives me grief because he doesn't get to go to daycare, lol
    He see's the afterschool program kids playing when we're heading home.

    Once the reason for working becomes a "me" time

    I know that some women who can stay home financially prefer to work. If that is what you are refering to as "me" time I think it's silly. Some women can't stay home because it's not for them. Not our place to judge why a woman works or stays home.

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 10:50 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • I don't think your job has anything to do with your childrens respect for you as a mother. No matter if you work or stay home, as long as you are raising your children well, taking care of them and teaching them respect, they will respect you! Many working moms will not get their kids respect, same for SAHM. Working moms as well as SAHM can ignore their children and that will lead to resentment and disrespect.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 10:38 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • I think kids respect their mom for honesty. If a child can look back and say my mom worked an honest job to provide,not get away from us they appreciate that. I also think kids appreciate their SAHM's. I am a SAHM,my son is multi special needs and has many appointments.... that a babysitter would not be able to provide to him nor do they want the responsibility of caring for all his needs,

    Answer by RobinChristine at 10:43 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • I've seen many things in my years here at Cafemom between the battle of SAHM/WOHM. There was a woman on this Q&A section a couple of months ago who went on and on about how kids view their SAHM's as stupid and uneducated. Very nasty things will be written from both sides about the other side and, as far as I'm concerned, the only ones it is giving a bad name to are the people who are posting it.

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 10:53 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • My kids respected me when I was a SAHM and when I went back to work. My work situation had nothing to do with their respect.

    Answer by minnesotanice at 10:55 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • JMHO here but i think kids respect their parents and disrespect their parents equally whether they are stay at home or not. I personally am a SAHM, but we homeschool, and I have courses I take as well. . . My dd knows that education is always important, and as I am sure she will think me a lazy slacker later in her life (around teen years) that is fine, cause I know I am doing what is best for not only me but my family. I have all the respect in the world for mom's who work outside the home, and yes, many of them do a hell of a lot. But many SAHMs do just as much work too. . . Kids' form opinions by what they see. And I think that anyone who says that kids respect SAHMs more is needs a bit of enlightenment. Cause that just isn't they way it is all of the time. JMHO

    Answer by Kirs at 11:10 PM on Jun. 9, 2011