Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Advice Please!

My boyfriend and I have been dating for quite sometime and he wants to introduce me to his two children. The problem is, his ex-wife told him she doesn't ever want me around her children and refuses to let him bring them around me. Her reason? She hated me in high school due to the fact that I was dating a guy she liked at the time and she has yet to get over it even though we are quite a few years out of high school. And because she considers me a home wrecking whore even though they were separated long before he and I got together. Any advice on how to handle this problem?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:45 PM on Jun. 9, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • She can't keep his kids from him because of you! I'd be writing a letter to the judge if I were your boyfriend!!
    cmgIII

    Answer by cmgIII at 11:49 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • Best advice is for you to stay out of it and leave it between boyfriend and his ex.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 11:50 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • How long do you consider "quite sometime" ? I would give it some more time and keep focusing on the relationship of you two. Why make things more difficult ? If your relationship works out there will be plenty of opportunities for you to meet them. Good Luck...
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 11:51 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • well honestly she can't control what he does when the kids are with him... so I don't really see that there is a problem. If he chooses to abide by her wishes there isn't anything you can do about it either.

    traren

    Answer by traren at 11:56 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • let him handle it. If he doesn't then you know where you stand. If he does then everyone happy (minus the Bitter B!tch) and you dont have to be the bad guy.
    AquariusOne

    Answer by AquariusOne at 11:57 PM on Jun. 9, 2011

  • She's just trying to control him. She can't keep his kids from him.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:06 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • You're never going to win her over--she's immature for one thing.
    She can't keep his kids from him and she can't have a say in who he dates etc so...I don't see where there's a true problem in you meeting his children. Unless, he's backing down because of her threats? IDK.
    Sounds messy though with her butting into his personal relationship life. That part of their life is OVER! Only thing between them is the children.
    KellyGirl_TX

    Answer by KellyGirl_TX at 5:28 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I imagine there is much more to the situation other than 'you dated a guy she liked.'

    All other things aside, I say the kids don't need the stress of bringing you into the situation that already sounds tense. Let him be alone with his kids when he has them. I don't know how long 'quite some time' is, but if you think that you should be allowed to see the kids as well, then talk to you BF about it. But I do think this is between him and their mother.

    I doubt if the situation is going to magically get better, so I'd decide if you can handle it before you decide to go any further with the relationship.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • why are so many saying 'she can't keep him from his kids?' it doesn't sound like she is keeping him away from his kids, she just doesn't want the girlfriend around the kids.
    I can't say I understand men that feel that their girlfriend has to be around when they see their children.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.