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2 Bumps

It's only just begun and I don't think I can make it, What can I do?

Ds just turned 2 3 weeks ago and is already chest deep in the terrible 2's. He went from being able to play by himself and wanting help, to clinging to my leg all day long and full out refuseing to even take the cup of juice he was begging for 2 seconds ago.

We have only been up for 45 mins and this is what has happened so far. He threw a tantrum crying and hanging on my leg because he was ready to eat and I still had to make breakfast. It got so bad that the 5 mins it took me to whip of the cream of wheat ended with him in time out. Then after his very full 2nd bowl he started crying because I told him it was all gone. I just ignored him and went to use the restroom. He followed me in trying to shove and pull me of the toilet. He's only calm now because we are sitting together on the couch, watching Cars.

I wish I could say it was just cuse he is tired but the last week has been like this:(

I'm going to loose my mind if he keeps this up. In the 2 years of his life I have never felt so badly a need to run away from him and hide.

How do I get him through this, I know it's normal but geesh!

Answer Question
 
MrsLLove

Asked by MrsLLove at 8:05 AM on Jun. 10, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 16 (2,387 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Wait until he turns 16 and you will wish for these times.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 8:12 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • My ds is 20 months old and has been going through the same thing for over 2 months. I have ni idea how I have kept my sanity this long but every morning I somehow muster the energy to go again. Just remember what I tell myself every day- "And this to, shall pass"
    wendydays

    Answer by wendydays at 8:14 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • It's time to start spanking his butt and teaching him that kind of behavior will not be tolerated in your home. Of course, he will dominate and terrorize you if you allow it. You have to teach him that you are the parent and that he is the child, and that your rules will be enforced. This is where parenting gets hard, but it's also where you set the tone for the next 18 years in your home. The choice is to either allow him to rule your home or to teach him that you and your husband are in charge and that he will obey and do it respectfully. Get you a small flexible ruler or a plastic flyswatter and go to work on teaching him that he is not in control of your home. Tell him once what you want done or stopped. Do not threaten or count or do anything else. He will soon learn that you mean business. Love must be tough, and you must love him enough to teach him to honor and obey his parents. It's hard, but it's worth it.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:16 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • Say as calm as you can. Make it clear what is acceptable and what is not.  Ignore the tantrums and tell him when he calms down you can talk/listen. I had to ignore my sons tantrums to get through them. Have plenty of one on one time with him and praise all the time  whenever he does things right. Plus make him your helper for any task - like helping with breakfast (just one example). It goes a long way in minimizing stress because it makes him feel like he is helping and is a distraction for him.  GL!!

    whitepeppers

    Answer by whitepeppers at 8:18 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • i have to agree Nanny B it's time for some harsher punishment. But the key here is consistancy. You have to follow thru with it everytime and it will help keep the order and show that you are the parent and he is the child.
    amberpaiz

    Answer by amberpaiz at 8:21 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • Just hang in there...that's all you can do. Keep using time out, but be consistent. Set a timer for 2 minutes and if he gets up take him by the hand and put him back, restarting the timer. Do not talk to him! You may be doing this for quite some time, but it should work. My grandson is going through the same thing now. We try to ignore him as much as possible, but he throws himself head first forward or backward on the floor, carpet, sidewalk. At this age, it's a good idea to make arrangements for some relief. I try to keep my 2 small grandchildren overnight at least once a week so my son and daughter-in-law can have a "date" night. And, I feel if the time outs don't work, try spanking....different things work on different children. Good luck!
    rosiemendo

    Answer by rosiemendo at 8:21 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • Time out, time out and time out. My daughter is 3 and she was like your son since the last 1.5 years, so i can share my experience. Spanking leads to aggressive child. Besides your child loves you less. thats for sure. I have tried everything : from spanking to positive discipline. What works is time out for 2 minutes, in your sons, case, until he says sorry and explains you, why he was put to the time out. My daugter at this point, does not like time out and the frequency is decreasing. Other important thing is that you have to observe your son and not to put him to time out if he is sick, or over tired, or did not eat yet, or didnt sleep well. All these factors contributes to acting out. And of course - many praise along the way. And God, oh God, help you with the patience, Mom.
    LadyGI

    Answer by LadyGI at 8:35 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • Tootoobusy LOL, LOL, True to that!
    We all go through phases in life. A teacher once said to me that little children are LEARNING to "control their emotions". Our instincts tell us that we can kick and yell when we are frustrated but our society teach us that is not the NORM. Be patient and talk to your child. They don't mind seeing you crying, upset, frustrated, these feelings/emotions are what make us humans. You said that you're already applying punishment and restrictions. You are doing OK!
    With my DS2 I have him in the kitchen counter with me preparing breakfast. If he throws a tantrum let him unwind. We all need to let it out once in a while.
    Cafemomoftwo217

    Answer by Cafemomoftwo217 at 8:36 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • For example when you said the cream of wheat is all gone sweetie, but Mommy will give you some fruit, Do you just say no more? Or do you take the time to explain things to him. When he starts to scream do you pick him up and place him in time out and give a reason, also his time outs should be about 2 minutes in length. I remember when my son had a full blown tantrum once, I laid down right next to him and copied his behavior, he stopped and started to laugh, I said this is what you look like, so lets try using our words instead of screaming, it honestly worked! Good luck momma and this too shall pass, I don't suggest you use spanking his butt as a consistent punishment.
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 8:37 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • It's probably a growth spurt or he may be feeling under the wheather this week. I went through the same thing, like most Moms. Please don't spank him, inflicting pain on the poor little guy is not the answer. Have you tried Baby Einstein DVD's. They are soothing & keep their attention for a while. This is a phase & YOU have to hang in there. Try to distract him & defer his attention to something else. This is just part of him growing up.
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 9:14 AM on Jun. 10, 2011

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