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What would you do? Its getting old.

My DH and I usually have dinner on monday nights, and its usually a few of our close friends and sometimes my in-laws. I'm the one that makes dinner, dessert, and do all the clean up/set-up. My problem is we always buy the food, and I cook it and I'm generally left with a mess unless my in-laws are over and help me clean up. Even then I'm still left with some clean up because our friends are usually over pretty late. I'm starting to think I need to put an end to it. Most of them dont say a word to me until monday comes around, and I know we are busy, and they know that too but I'm starting to feel used. Especially when they all will go out to dinner together on other nights and being as we're the only ones with kids we cant always afford to do that and I think that since we feed them every single week that it would be nice if they offered to pay for us because we feed them so much, and I'm always stuck cleaning up. What would you guys do. I really don't think our friends are doing this to be mean or rude I just dont think they see how much this puts on me and how much it really costs to feed 5-8 people every week when normally it would be two adults, and a 2 year old kid.

Should I stop? Is it wrong to think they need to repay the favor? I'm worried any decision I make will hurt our friendships. Help!


Asked by husky_grlie08 at 12:14 PM on Jun. 10, 2011 in Entertainment

Level 18 (5,321 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I would talk to the others' coming over. Face it direct and be honest. People usually are better to adjust when you tell them you need their help... Just approach it to get their opinions.... Do not be afraid, it is how you handle this that will make them not be offended. tell them that you need advice and don't want to offend anyone involved.. Just say "I need your help to figure out how this could be better for everyone. Keep it humerous. :-) It will be OK. It reminds me of when we lived on the lake. Every weekend people would come over and bring hotdogs. I swore I would never eat them again. When these years are gone you will cherish these memories. Have a great weekend.

    Answer by LeJane at 2:05 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I would stop having people over so often if I were you.

    Answer by lowencope at 12:16 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I think its a lot to do every single week. You might try doing it just once a month and if anyone asks why tell them the expense and time and clean up every week became too much for you. Maybe they might have a new appreciation.

    Answer by meooma at 12:17 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • Its mainly because my DH wants to have people over, its his ONE day off a week and he works ALOT. Its the only time we see anyone and we cant just up and go anywhere when we feel like it having two small kids. And its NOT because they aren't real friends, these are some of the best people I have ever known in my entire life, but I mean we won't be able to see them that often if we stop because my DH works constantly, they are very busy as well and I'm home with the kids, which is the part that will hurt the friendship. We've already lost touch with alot of people because our schedule is very busy and we dont get to go out and spend time with people as much as we'd like.

    Comment by husky_grlie08 (original poster) at 12:21 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I'm worried any decision I make will hurt our friendships.--

    if that's the case, they aren't real friendships.

    Answer by dullscissors at 12:16 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I think you should do it less often. If your friendships are threatened by that, they're not good friendships.

    Answer by SWasson at 12:16 PM on Jun. 10, 2011