Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

If you have lost your own parents,.. How did their death affect you in a good or bad way

how old were you when you lost them?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:00 PM on Jun. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I was 43 when I lost my mom. I was 45 when I lost my dad. I think it affected me both, bad and good. I used to talk to them everyday even though they lived out of state. When mom died I went on this I will get healthy so I won't leave my son, I did and did good for a bit over a year. Then old habits came back. My dad's passing made me more "philosophical" I think. 

    Dahis

    Answer by Dahis at 3:04 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I was 3 when I witnessed my moms murder. I still don't know who my birth father is. Can't ask mom. I have PTSD and have spent years in therapy learning to 'deal' with it.
    Ms.Gwen

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 3:05 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • My dad died in 1992, when I was 28. It affected me terribly, because he and I had been kept apart by my Grandfather, who was molesting me, and feeding me lies about my dad, to keep me from getting close to him. Therefore, I'd always kept my dad at arm's length, and when he died, we had never really spent any quality time together. It killed me when I lost him, and I still grieve, even now,although I've had therapy to deal with it all. I just hate that he and I were kept apart for my whole life, and never got to forge a relationship with one another. I found out the following March I was pregnant with my last child. I named him after my dad.
    cbk_mom3

    Answer by cbk_mom3 at 3:05 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I was 43 when my dad died in 1995 and 46 when my mom died. My world collapsed both times. They were sudden deaths. I was terribly depressed and haven't gotten over the loss yet.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:10 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I lost my dad 3 years ago when I was 27. It was really hard at first.. I came to terms with it.. saw a counselor.. had alot of support from friends and family and my DH of course ... I talk about him alot .. it's easier now. and it's nice to know I have someone up there watching over me and my DD.. I made my DD's middle name Jo after my dad.. his name was Joseph.
    RIP Dad.
    Emmajosmommy

    Answer by Emmajosmommy at 3:11 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I was 6 when my dad died and my mom died on my 31st birthday. I resent it for the most part when I see others my age that still have their parents. I have no idea how my life would have been different if I grew up with my dad. I wish my mom was there for those times when I need her and I wish the same about having a dad. There is no good side to having lost a parent. early in life. when I see people who are in their 50's and 60's and then loose their 96 yr old mom then I want to tell them to just be greatful you had all those years of memories that others did not get because their own parent died young. when a parent dies young there is nothing but sadness. my mom was 56 my dad was 41. they still had decades ahead of them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • My dad is dying now, the doctors have only given him a few weeks to live. Each day he is weaker. It is horrible watching him suffer, but I have learned a great life lesson in the past few months. I have learned to live life without regrets.
    There has been a lot of drama in my family for a long time. My dad has three kids from a previous marriage. His kids have cut him out of their lives and even after he reached out to them numerous times, they ignored and shunned him. Now he is dying and they are remorseful that they wasted so much time.
    One son has done a lot to make the time he has with dad matter and for the past few years has worked hard to have a relationship with him, but the other two have not. My dad has his part in the estrangement and he regrets it too.

    From now on I will live the best life I can and not let petty things keep me from the ones I love.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 3:15 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I was married and a Mom when my parents died--10 years apart---and I can't think of anything good about theirdeaths. I still think of things I want to tell them or ask them....then I remember I can't and its sad. But losing your parents is a part of life.
    minnesotanice

    Answer by minnesotanice at 3:32 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • I lost my mom when I was 41. We had taken care of our unfinished business long before she died, so I was able to let her go with no regrets, and no sadness. I was just glad that she wasn't hurting anymore. She died of Oatmeal cancer. It is a rare cancer that alcoholics get. It dries up their red blood cells to the consistancy of oatmeal flakes, and it comes on them ( the alcoholic quick and silently). My dad is now dying of alzheimers, and I have yet to go see him to take care of my unfinished business with him. I am having problems getting the nessessary paper work to be able to take my service dog with me when I go to see him.
    stitchintime

    Answer by stitchintime at 3:39 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

  • i was 27 when i lost my mom. realized i have no one to fall back on in case something happens so working on finishing my bachelor's degree. i just lost her this Jan & deployed 5 weeks later so when I get home the grieving will begin again.
    mrsary

    Answer by mrsary at 5:14 PM on Jun. 10, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN