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Best friend/money dilemma :(

My best friend is a millionaire. She is always inviting me and her other friends to birthday parties for herself and her kids. We have to fly or drive out of State for these functions. My annual house hold income is right at $150,000. Her friends incomes are less than half of mine. My question is Should she be responsible for paying for at least the transportation costs if she wants us to come to these events? Even though my family makes more than the average we have a mortgage, savings, bills etc. She mentioned she would pay for half my flight if I came to her birthday in September. Really? only half? I NEVER ask this friend for anything, but it really pisses me off when she selfishly asks her friends to inconvenience themselves to come hang out just because she wants to at our own expense.


Asked by Anonymous at 12:38 AM on Jun. 11, 2011 in Money & Work

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • My family and friends live in various states. If I am invited to an event, my first question would be can I afford to go. If I can I will, if I can not I will decline. You mentioned that it was your son's birthday. I would be planning to celebrate my childs birthday. You are creating memories. I would not want my child to say my mom went out of town and missed my birthday.

    Answer by Patricia587 at 10:44 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • Well, you can say no..... I don't understand why you are upset really, I think it is super nice she is willing to pay half! I mean, will she be mad if you don't go? Would you rather she not invite you?

    Answer by ILoveCade at 12:44 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • well honestly I think you are both wrong. She shouldnt be offended if you can't make it, but to expect HER to pay for it just because she happens to have the money doesn't make you a good friend either.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 1:36 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • I know some millionaires and my dad is one. A lot of them have their money tied up so they don't have a lot of access to cash. But even if they did, I think it is your responsibility to pay for your own flight.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 12:53 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • Then she doesn't sound like a very good friend. Just tell her no, give her your reasons, #1 being your sons birthday!! Which is and should obviously be way more important then any friend! And if she can't accept that and be happy you should just cut her out of your life.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 12:58 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • You aren't obligated to attend any of her functions. If you can't afford it or don't want to spend the money don't go. She isn't required nor should she be expected to pay for your transportation.

    Answer by meooma at 6:46 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • You are never obligated to go to any of her parties. If you don't want to go and can't afford it, just tell her no. Tell her it is your sons birthday and that you are having a party for him, end of story. If she seriously gets mad at you for that, too bad.

    Answer by slw123 at 9:12 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • If you are invited to an event - friend or not - there is never an expectation that transportation will be provided. I've never heard of that before. Honestly, I think you're using the money as an excuse because you aren't happy with how this person is treating you. Any friend worth their salt would understand not being able to attend an event because of your son's birthday. The scale of the event and the cost of airfare are irrelevant to that.


    Answer by Dr.Donna at 10:24 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • well this is a touchy subject b/c it's about money. Just explain to her even tho it's half you still can't afford it and maybe you could work something out instead.

    Answer by amberpaiz at 12:40 AM on Jun. 11, 2011

  • I think if she invited you, then you pay transportation. Thats how my friends and I do it. But if you can not go, then say so.

    Answer by canelamami at 12:40 AM on Jun. 11, 2011