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How many stay at home Moms have their husband helping out with housework and child care(as in helping with homework, making sure they brush their teeth, etc)? If so, how do you get him to help you with this?

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Adjustingspace

Asked by Adjustingspace at 12:08 AM on Jun. 13, 2011 in Relationships

Level 5 (70 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I just ask. Just because I stay at home doesn't make our child any less his. We take a pretty equal role in caring for our son. Usually I only ask for housework help on the weekends, and it's usually just the garbage.
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 12:15 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • It does aggravate me sometimes when I get overwhelmed with doing it all myself, but usually when he does help he just aggravates me more cause he'll ask 50 questions "where does this go?" "How do you work this?" "Why?" "When?" "Where?" ... lol & I guess Im considered the "bad cop", cause my husband is always the one egging my son on when he's getting into stuff, or he'll laugh about him doing something that Im trying to keep him from doing, so my son usually doesnt take him seriously when its time to buckle down, get his bath time, teeth brush, bedtime & those sorts of things.
    Jessica1991

    Answer by Jessica1991 at 12:20 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • Actually I should rephrase the word "housework" I am really referring to picking up after himself, putting laundry in one place (right side in) shoes in the closet, if he slept in later make the bed etc......you get the point. I think this little stuff is the ringer of my fire, I get so mad and this is because I feel he doesn't acknowledge that what I do all day is work too. He works from home so its not like he doesn't see me, but still he doesn't notice it.
    Adjustingspace

    Comment by Adjustingspace (original poster) at 12:28 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • My dh has never done much as far as help me out and actually when I leave town like I did a week ago I came home to a dirty messy house and no food...it was obvious that the housekeeper/cook was gone for a few days. Even when my son was a baby and dh was laid off I would test my dh and not change the boy all day just to see if his dad would step up and change him...no never would happen. I seriously get left 100% of everything even if my dh is on a lay off. The guy is so helpless that he can't move things around in the fridge to find what he wants! He will stand there with the fridge door open wanting chip dip and I have to get up and show him that if he moved the milk he would have found it.....my husband is a lost puppy dog and cannot do anything no matter how much I talk to him about it and encourage him he is just clueless
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 12:31 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • i pretty much take care of our daughter he helps out by like changing her like if he notices it first he changes her.... but as far as house work i cook breakfast and lunch do the dishes n do watever needs done around the house and most nights he cooks dinner or we cook together if he cooks ill do the dishes n if i cook he does them but now hes deployed and since he has left i miss all the little things he did that i never really realized he did!!
    Alyson_Torres09

    Answer by Alyson_Torres09 at 12:50 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I'm not a SAHM, but my husband was raised by one, and one who never taught him how to take care of himself, really. She did everything for him short of wiping his rump. I literally had to teach him how to clean up after himself when we moved in together and I realized he had never been taught. Although he still doesn't seem to pitch in just because something needs to be done (aka-- i have to tell him what needs to be done), it has gotten a lot better when I explained-- me tired = no sex. If I have to do everything, I have no time to address us. If he's willing to take some of the burden, then I have that time to devote to us!

    I hope that helps.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I'm not a SAHM but I don't have this problem. My guy does dishes, he cooks, does laundry, mops and cleans the bathrooms. He is great. I don't ask, there are even times he asks me to SIT DOWN for awhile and just relax. I give him his freedoms, he plays computer games, listens to music, builds little model cars, whatever he wants. I don't know what I do to have him help so much...the only thing I can think of is he doesn't like it when I am grouchy or too tired from doing too much.
    Elena G.

    Answer by Elena G. at 1:07 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • What is a SAHM? I'm new, could that be the reason I don't know what it stands for? (I hope)
    Adjustingspace

    Comment by Adjustingspace (original poster) at 1:18 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • stay at home mom _ sahm
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 1:27 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I work pt but mostly I'm home and hubby steps in when he needs to if I am gone he does stuff like our daughters hair gets the kids clothes baths etc he's their dad and that's what parents do
    rinamomof2

    Answer by rinamomof2 at 6:49 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

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